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  "sourcesContent": ["import{jsx as e,jsxs as t}from\"react/jsx-runtime\";import{addPropertyControls as a,ControlType as n,Link as i}from\"framer\";import*as r from\"react\";let o=\"SpoQpzRcg\",s=\"Vu_MjvNyj\",l=\"XUP79sIq3\",h=\"EQBQjCniZ\",c=\"BWeBLO_ZW\",d=(e,t)=>{if(e&&\"object\"==typeof e)return{...e,alt:t};},p=[{index:0,id:\"Ww7XBN_2Z\",[o]:\"ADHD and Neurodiversity in counselling\",[s]:\"adhd-and-neurodiversity-counselling\",[l]:d({src:\"https://framerusercontent.com/images/8EOSeK61fAou6tkTAMXXOL88mo.jpg\",srcSet:\"https://framerusercontent.com/images/8EOSeK61fAou6tkTAMXXOL88mo.jpg?scale-down-to=512 512w, https://framerusercontent.com/images/8EOSeK61fAou6tkTAMXXOL88mo.jpg 820w\"},\"\"),[h]:\"I have worked with many people with\\xa0ADHD\\xa0and autism.\\xa0Neurodiversity describes the differences in the way that people's brains work... \",[c]:/*#__PURE__*/t(r.Fragment,{children:[/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"I have worked with many people with\\xa0ADHD\\xa0and autism.\\xa0Neurodiversity describes the differences in the way that people's brains work. \"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"There is no 'right' way for the brain to work, there is a wide range of ways that people perceive and respond to the world, these differences are to be encouraged and embraced.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Some clients come to counselling with questions as to their characteristics and traits, questioning and wanting to explore this. They may go on to seek diagnosis with the support of therapy.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Counselling can play a huge part in helping people come to terms with their diagnosis and cope with how the condition impacts on their lives and relationships.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"\\xa0\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"ADHD is a neurodevelopmental condition; that is to say, its symptoms, and associated behaviours and traits are the result of a person\u2019s brain developing differently during the key stages of development before they were born or as a very young child.\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0 \\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"strong\",{children:\"Causes of neurodevelopmental conditions include:\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"ul\",{children:[/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Genetics\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Trauma at birth\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Infectious disease\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Immune disorders\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Nutritional factors\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:[/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Physical trauma\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})})]})]}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"It is becoming increasingly recognised that, along with ADHD, a person may experience symptoms of other neurodevelopmental conditions such as autism, Asperger\u2019s, Tourette\u2019s syndrome, Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD), dyslexia, and dyspraxia.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"ul\",{children:[/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Approximately 1 in 2 people with ADHD have dyslexia\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Approximately 1 in 2 people with ADHD have dyspraxia\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"9 in 10 people with Tourette's have ADHD\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:[/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"2 in 3 people with ADHD have autistic spectrum traits, and people with ADHD are 8-fold more likely to meet full criteria for an\\xa0autistic spectrum diagnosis\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})})]})]}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[\"While it is\\xa0common for neurodevelopmental conditions to occur with co-occurring\\xa0\",/*#__PURE__*/e(i,{href:\"https://adhdaware.org.uk/what-is-adhd/adhd-and-mental-health/\",openInNewTab:!1,smoothScroll:!1,children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"a\",{children:\"mental health conditions\"})}),\", (eg. ADHD + bipolar), due to poor awareness it is also common for neurodevelopmental conditions to be misdiagnosed as mental illness.\\xa0\"]}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"h2\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"strong\",{children:\"What is neurodiversity?\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"strong\",{children:\"\\xa0\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Neurodiversity is a term that refers to the natural differences between people\\xa0 originated in the 1990\u2019s by Australian sociologist Judy Singer. It can be compared to terms such as race, culture, class and gender and is useful to describe people with varying characteristics and behaviours of neurodevelopmental conditions alongside the \u201Cneurotypical\u201D majority in an open accepting and non-prejudiced way.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"\\xa0\"}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[\"It is thought that up to 15% of the population are thought to be\",/*#__PURE__*/e(\"strong\",{children:\"\\xa0neurodiverse.\"}),\"\\xa0 The remaining majority are\\xa0\",/*#__PURE__*/e(\"strong\",{children:\"neurotypical.\"})]}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"img\",{alt:\"\",className:\"framer-image\",\"data-framer-asset\":\"data:framer/asset-reference,BNMs5IpQbo96LZc7PKltrPvJUs.jpg\",\"data-framer-height\":\"694\",\"data-framer-width\":\"957\",height:\"347\",src:\"https://framerusercontent.com/images/BNMs5IpQbo96LZc7PKltrPvJUs.jpg\",style:{aspectRatio:\"957 / 694\"},width:\"478\"}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[\"Diagram created by Mary Colley & Joseph Aquilina\",/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{}),\"NeuroKnowHow.com\"]}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"ul\",{children:[/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"~8% of people in the UK are thought to have ADHD.\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"~10% of people in the UK are thought to have dyslexia.\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"~8% of people in the UK are thought to have dyspraxia.\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"~6% of people in the UK are thought to have dyscalculia.\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"~1% of people in the UK are thought to have an autistic spectrum condition.\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"~1% of people in the UK are thought to have Tourette's syndrome.\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"It is thought that as research develops, certain mental health conditions such as psychopathy, some personality disorders and schizophrenic conditions will come to be re-interpreted as having been diagnosed both in people who experience symptoms due to poor mental health and people who are experiencing neurodiversity and require different approaches to care.\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"An additional ~3% of the population are known to have generalised\\xa0intellectual disability.\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Some people believe that being generally intellectually gifted might be a form of neurodiversity, citing rare conditions like savant syndrome and hyperthymesia (highly superior autobiographical memory) as extreme examples of neurodiverse giftedness.\"})})]}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Many aspects of society are based on the assumption that there is one form of 'the human mind' and accordingly, many systems (education, employment, health and social services, social relationships) have been built up premised on being neurotypical. Creating and having more understanding of neurodivergence is not only beneficial for everyone, but fair.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"h2\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"strong\",{children:\"Language to use\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"ul\",{children:[/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Neurodivergent: When talking about the individual person.\\xa0\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Neurodiverse refers to the community.\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Neurotypical: People that have typical brain functions.\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Coexisting conditions: Use this instead of comorbid conditions.\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Conditions: Neurodevelopmental conditions over disorders.\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Hyperfocus: Overfocus on one thing or task.\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Often for many hours.\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Special interest: Obsessive special interest research or hobby.\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Masking and camouflaging: trying to blend in and act like a neurotypical. Often exhausting.\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"High functioning autism. Functional labels are outdated and can suggest inaccurate assumptions about a person's ability and difficulties. They separate the person from the condition.\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Aspergers syndrome: An older term meaning high functioning autism.\\xa0\"})})]}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"\\xa0\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"strong\",{children:\"Some ADHD traits:\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"ul\",{children:[/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"High intolerance\\xa0 of uncertainty\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Now and not now thinking.\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Ruminating\\xa0\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Misreading feedback\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Catastrophising\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Negative self\\xa0 talk\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"People pleasing\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Emotional outbursts\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Racing brain\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Darting mind\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Stimming\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Burn out\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Masking\\xa0\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Hyper focus. 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We believe the mind is naturally multiple and that is a good thing. Just like members of a family, inner parts are forced from their valuable states into extreme roles within us. Self is in everyone. It can\u2019t be damaged. It knows how to heal.\\xa0\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"IFS is frequently used as an evidence-based psychotherapy, helping people heal by accessing and healing their protective and wounded inner parts. IFS creates inner and outer connectedness by helping people first access their Self and, from that core, come to understand and heal their parts. \\xa0\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Having originally trained as a Gestalt therapist and then in Systemic Family Therapy, my current interest and ongoing training in Internal Family Systems Therapy fits together well.\\xa0\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Through Gestalt therapy we set up a dialogue perhaps between two parts of self, using two chairs. This lends itself well to working with parts of self in IFS.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"In response to danger, the individuals in human systems at all levels take on roles that can be categorised by three groups. One group tends to be highly protective, strategic, and interested in controlling the environment to keep things safe. In IFS we call the members of this group \u2018managers\u2019.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"The second group, the more sensitive members of this system can feel injured, hurt, outraged and the managers will banish them from the system for their own protection. These parts are called \u2018exiles\u2019\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"The third part reacts powerfully and automatically without concern for consequences, known in Internal Family Systems as \u2018firefighters\u2019 \u2013 fighting the flames of exiled emotions.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"The more strength of feeling, hurt, reaction in the exiled part the more the protective parts, the managers and firefighters, fear it\u2019s release and the harder these parts work to suppress and restrain.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"In Internal Family Systems Therapy we will investigate your system\u2019s level.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"\u201COnce parts open inner space, the Self also exudes energy. Some people feel this energy as a kind of vibrating, pulsing charge that moves through their bodies\u2026. Our healing wisdom is contained in the Self \u2026Once we are able to love our parts, we can also relate with love to people who resemble our parts.\u201D\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/t(\"em\",{children:[\"Internal Family Systems Therapy\\xa0\",/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{}),\"Richard C Schwartz and Martha Sweezy\"]})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[\"If you'd like to find out more, then do \",/*#__PURE__*/e(i,{href:\"https://brighton-counselling.co.uk/contact\",openInNewTab:!1,smoothScroll:!1,children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"a\",{children:\"get in touch\"})}),\" and we can have an initial chat free of charge.\"]})]})},{index:2,id:\"cjyZmpGEu\",[o]:\"Using sand tray in the therapy room\",[s]:\"using-sand-tray-in-the-therapy-room\",[l]:d({src:\"https://framerusercontent.com/images/XvNE19r0TWh2Kl5fGVVfw4Jt8.jpg\"},\"Sand Tray\"),[h]:\"Sand tray therapy uses sand and a variety of objects such as  shells stones and small figures and toys to create stories that represent a person\u2019s inner world...\",[c]:/*#__PURE__*/t(r.Fragment,{children:[/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Sand tray therapy uses sand and a variety of objects such as shells stones and small figures and toys to create stories that represent a person\u2019s inner world. These help the person become aware of unknown past or current challenges in life.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"The free, non structured, and protective space of sand therapy offers a way for people to heal through the therapeutic process.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"It creates a safe environment that allows people to release their feelings, conflicts, and emotions and bring unconscious fears, thoughts, and memories into their conscious awareness.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Through sand tray therapy, a person can return to past experiences in a safe and contained environment and become an active agent in the experience.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"\\xa0\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Sand tray therapy is an expressive therapy that has the unique and impressive quality of being quite adaptive and flexible. It can incorporate a wide variety of theoretical and technical psychotherapeutic approaches. It can be directive or non-directive, fully non-verbal, or verbally assisted. It can also integrate techniques from a wide spectrum of counselling approaches. This makes sand tray therapy a truly cross-theoretical intervention. Sand tray therapy has numerous applications and possibilities as a psychotherapeutic intervention. It can be used as a primary or secondary counselling tool and can be applied within all personality and counselling theoretical models. It can be an adjunct to verbal therapy, or be entirely expressive and projective. Sand tray therapy can be directive or non-directive, and it can also be fun.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"\\xa0\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"The figures in the sand can tell a story and represent different parts of self or perhaps represent different key figures in your life. The story can unfold and change creatively in the sand and can be added to and built on over a few sessions.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"\\xa0\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Sand tray pictures can be reflective, self-expressive and represent many aspects of life such as people, ideas, situations, and feelings. They can also symbolise a person\u2019s \u201Cinner world\u201D. People can become more aware of their unconscious and of any current difficulties in their life.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Previously unknown thoughts and feelings may emerge and become visible through the imagery and symbolic approach that is applied. This can make sessions feel very deep and powerful.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Sand tray work in counselling like all things is an invitation. It can be adapted to be used in the way that works best for you. It is a tool another way at looking at past and present and future too.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[\"If you'd like to find out more, then do \",/*#__PURE__*/e(i,{href:\"https://brighton-counselling.co.uk/contact\",openInNewTab:!1,smoothScroll:!1,children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"a\",{children:\"get in touch\"})}),\" and we can have an initial chat free of charge.\"]})]})},{index:3,id:\"J5ha9_GEB\",[o]:\"Is counselling for you? Small steps for lifting the mood.\",[s]:\"is-counselling-for-you\",[l]:d({src:\"https://framerusercontent.com/images/MpbCWFoT1xLZVLZJKpcXTXBiAyI.jpg\",srcSet:\"https://framerusercontent.com/images/MpbCWFoT1xLZVLZJKpcXTXBiAyI.jpg?scale-down-to=512 512w, https://framerusercontent.com/images/MpbCWFoT1xLZVLZJKpcXTXBiAyI.jpg 820w\"},\"Thinking about counselling\"),[h]:\"We can find ourselves in a dip and not sure why. Post-holiday blues, the menopause, children leaving home, family worries, ageing parents...\",[c]:/*#__PURE__*/t(r.Fragment,{children:[/*#__PURE__*/e(\"img\",{alt:\"\",className:\"framer-image\",src:\"blob:https://framer.com/c2069f59-0dff-4174-93ed-aa65edb2fdfe\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"We can find ourselves in a dip and not sure why.\\xa0Post-holiday blues, the menopause, children leaving home, family worries, ageing parents.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"It can make a big difference to use some of the strategies mentioned in other blogs and places on my website, I thought it would be useful to bring them together here.\\xa0\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[/*#__PURE__*/e(i,{href:{pathVariables:{Vu_MjvNyj:\"feelings-of-accomplishment-and-purpose-in-client-work\"},unresolvedPathSlugs:{Vu_MjvNyj:{collectionId:\"Dp6iOgS4Q\",collectionItemId:\"IifKhJcck\"}},webPageId:\"FLZVLRIW6\"},openInNewTab:!1,smoothScroll:!1,children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"a\",{children:\"Feelings of accomplishment\"})}),\" (FOAs \u2013 Pellin Institute) can be found in little things. This can be as simple as getting out of bed making a coffee and starting your day or having some small task to do such as potting a plant or admiring a flower\\xa0in bud.\"]}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Certain music can lift the mood \u2013 this can be different for us all.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"\u2018Changing the environment\u2019 is a key strategy\\xa0for mood lifting. This could be as simple as leaving the house and walking around the block or sitting in a different room with a different view or perspective.\\xa0It is important to notice, how do I feel now, what do I need right now?\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"It can be really helpful to have some reminders when journaling, remembering that feelings pass, nothing stays the same in the ebb and flow of our lives.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Getting stuck in feelings can be tough or feeling stuck in patterns of behaviour, perhaps feeling cut off and isolated.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"h2\",{children:\"It is important to give ourselves permission to be where and how we are.\\xa0\"}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[\"We can ask ourselves questions such as \u2018where am I on the \",/*#__PURE__*/e(i,{href:{pathVariables:{Vu_MjvNyj:\"the-pendulum\"},unresolvedPathSlugs:{Vu_MjvNyj:{collectionId:\"Dp6iOgS4Q\",collectionItemId:\"o6Tep3Tx9\"}},webPageId:\"FLZVLRIW6\"},openInNewTab:!1,smoothScroll:!1,children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"a\",{children:\"pendulum\"})}),\" right now?\u2019 Perhaps feeling low, depleted, and in need of true rest. \",/*#__PURE__*/e(i,{href:{pathVariables:{Vu_MjvNyj:\"therapeutic-true-rest\"},unresolvedPathSlugs:{Vu_MjvNyj:{collectionId:\"Dp6iOgS4Q\",collectionItemId:\"Ge4BhKlCd\"}},webPageId:\"FLZVLRIW6\"},openInNewTab:!1,smoothScroll:!1,children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"a\",{children:\"True rest\"})}),\" can be different things for different people, perhaps a walk in nature, a therapeutic swim, reading a book, unplanned time to 'be'.\"]}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Whatever works for you to help get back into the body, connecting body and mind.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[\"The \",/*#__PURE__*/e(i,{href:{pathVariables:{Vu_MjvNyj:\"window-of-tolerance\"},unresolvedPathSlugs:{Vu_MjvNyj:{collectionId:\"Dp6iOgS4Q\",collectionItemId:\"JFOcQkaJo\"}},webPageId:\"FLZVLRIW6\"},openInNewTab:!1,smoothScroll:!1,children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"a\",{children:\"window of tolerance\"})}),\" is useful for noticing if we are experiencing racing thoughts, finding\\xa0it hard to think and feel at the same time. What do you need right now? Some space alone perhaps. If you are sensitive to the feelings of others and can pick up on what\u2019s going on for them quite easily this can be quite hard to be, with especially amongst a group of people. It is good to give yourself permission to have time out or time alone to regroup with yourself.\"]}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Through counselling we can explore the kind of patterns that emerge in your life and the strategies that can help navigate this. We are all unique and different things work for each of us. It can be effective often to separate everything out and look at the different layers as separate and differentiated from each other, hopefully making it all a bit more manageable.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"If you are wondering if counselling is for you why not think of it as a place to explore the known and the unknown. It is also a place where we can feel vulnerable and strong at the same time.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[\"Branded as the opposite of triggers, Deb Dana, LCSW, psychotherapist and author, \",/*#__PURE__*/e(i,{href:\"https://www.refinery29.com/en-gb/how-glimmers-work-polyvagal-theory\",openInNewTab:!0,smoothScroll:!1,children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"a\",{children:\"coined the term 'glimmers'\"})}),\", and says that they\u2019re tiny micro-moments of joy that allow us to feel calm and give us a sense of inner peace. While we\u2019re more aware of our joy during the big moments, it\u2019s also up to us to look to the small moments for signs of happiness \u2014 you might be surprised at what you find.\"]}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[\"If you'd like to find out more, then do \",/*#__PURE__*/e(i,{href:{webPageId:\"GKfMtsGkN\"},openInNewTab:!1,smoothScroll:!1,children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"a\",{children:\"get in touch\"})}),\" and we can have an initial chat free of charge.\"]})]})},{index:4,id:\"oO9FMCWh6\",[o]:\"Walking talking therapy\",[s]:\"walking-talking-therapy\",[l]:d({src:\"https://framerusercontent.com/images/9soHRRctjsxCkolWCQrvb9WwYs.jpg\",srcSet:\"https://framerusercontent.com/images/9soHRRctjsxCkolWCQrvb9WwYs.jpg?scale-down-to=512 512w, https://framerusercontent.com/images/9soHRRctjsxCkolWCQrvb9WwYs.jpg?scale-down-to=1024 1024w, https://framerusercontent.com/images/9soHRRctjsxCkolWCQrvb9WwYs.jpg?scale-down-to=2048 2048w, https://framerusercontent.com/images/9soHRRctjsxCkolWCQrvb9WwYs.jpg 2560w\"},\"Walking talking therapy\"),[h]:\"When we move and shift our environment, we may find that we can think differently about aspects of our lives that may have before seemed unchangeable...\",[c]:/*#__PURE__*/t(r.Fragment,{children:[/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Walking talking therapy is a concept that can be best described as \u201Ctaking the traditional counselling session outdoors\u201D. When we move and shift our environment, we may find that we can think differently about aspects of our lives that may have before seemed unchangeable. What do clients think about my new Walking Talking Therapy sessions?\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[\"\u201CDuring walking talking therapy I find it easier to express my feelings compared with traditional sat down therapy. There feels more stimulus to influence what we talk about. I also feel less on the spot as eye contact isn\u2019t as intense. I feel more comfortable with the connection with nature \u2013 walking through the park or by the sea. It\u2019s calming. We\u2019re looking at ADHD and walking talking therapy definitely helps.\u201D\",/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{}),\"Our first session will take place in my counselling room where we will discuss issues of confidentiality and how we will negotiate encountering other people when out walking. It is important to remember that people walking and talking side by side is a very common sight and therefore a client and therapist walking side by side doesn't look any different. We can decide together where you would prefer to walk whether it's perhaps by the sea or amongst the trees.\"]}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"h2\",{children:\"Why choose Walking and Talking counselling sessions?\"}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{}),\"Walking and talking counselling gets you outside and moving also being close to nature can be meditative and grounding. We can talk about grounding techniques using the five senses this can help people who have experienced distress and trauma.\",/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{}),\"Physical activity can enhance the mental and physical health of clients. Physical activity has also been shown to reduce levels of depression and anxiety and can help to prevent depressive symptoms.\",/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{}),\"Walking and talking therapy helps to release tension and can stimulate new thoughts and ideas. Even if you're confident talking face to face to a counsellor, you might become apprehensive when confronting particular issues. The combination of walking and fresh air allows for easier engagement and process, and you can feel more grounded as you're moving forward while walking.\"]}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[\"During a walking and talking counselling session, you lead the pace just like in a traditional counselling session. Yet the dynamic is fairly different. Client and counsellor are on the same footing, literally. We will walk together side by side, for some people this can feel more comfortable.\\xa0\",/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{}),\"Walking and talking therapy is also particularly helpful for people feeling they are trapped in a life or roles that don't fit for them anymore, people looking for change. Being outdoors and talking about their issues enhances the renewal of a sense of freedom.\\xa0\",/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{}),\"Some people find it easier to open up while walking and talking and less intense to walk alongside each other making occasional eye contact. It is also possible to alternate - walking talking counselling sessions are not fixed. The weather is also a factor \\xa0to be considered.\",/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"strong\",{children:'\"Somehow the simple act of walking while talking out life\\'s issues creates an environment of possibility and change.\"'})]}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[\"If you'd like to find out more, then do \",/*#__PURE__*/e(i,{href:\"https://brighton-counselling.co.uk/contact\",openInNewTab:!1,smoothScroll:!1,children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"a\",{children:\"get in touch\"})}),\" and we can have an initial chat free of charge.\"]})]})},{index:5,id:\"JFOcQkaJo\",[o]:\"Window of tolerance\",[s]:\"window-of-tolerance\",[l]:d({src:\"https://framerusercontent.com/images/2Q6PS18mIewi28vwV8vHGRjSGo.jpg\",srcSet:\"https://framerusercontent.com/images/2Q6PS18mIewi28vwV8vHGRjSGo.jpg?scale-down-to=512 512w, https://framerusercontent.com/images/2Q6PS18mIewi28vwV8vHGRjSGo.jpg 850w\"},\"Window of tolerance\"),[h]:\"When we are pushed beyond the edges of the window of tolerance we experience hyper or hypo arousal. Understanding this can be life changing...\",[c]:/*#__PURE__*/t(r.Fragment,{children:[/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"During our early development if we have a healthy attachment with our parent or carer who is consistently available and nurturing, this lays very good foundations for the development of our brain and nervous system. Over time this allows us to learn how to effectively self-regulate independently.\\xa0\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"\u201CWindow of Tolerance\u201D is now a commonly used term in therapy to understand and describe normal brain/body reactions, especially in adverse times. When we are within the parameters of the window of tolerance, this allows for the highs and lows or ups and downs of emotions we experience, in a manageable way.\\xa0\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"img\",{alt:\"Window of Tolerance\",className:\"framer-image\",\"data-framer-asset\":\"data:framer/asset-reference,o1V5McD5mKDlhiBPmb2JmULeUyQ.jpg\",\"data-framer-height\":\"563\",\"data-framer-width\":\"1000\",height:\"281\",src:\"https://framerusercontent.com/images/o1V5McD5mKDlhiBPmb2JmULeUyQ.jpg\",style:{aspectRatio:\"1000 / 563\"},width:\"500\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[\"We may experience hurt, anxiety, pain or anger which brings us close to the edges of the window of\\xa0tolerance but generally we are able to use strategies to keep us within\\xa0this window. Similarly, we may feel too exhausted, sad, or shut down but we generally shift out of this. This means that we are functioning in the tolerable areas of the pendulum (see blog post\\xa0\",/*#__PURE__*/e(i,{href:{pathVariables:{Vu_MjvNyj:\"the-pendulum\"},unresolvedPathSlugs:{Vu_MjvNyj:{collectionId:\"Dp6iOgS4Q\",collectionItemId:\"o6Tep3Tx9\"}},webPageId:\"FLZVLRIW6\"},openInNewTab:!1,smoothScroll:!1,children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"a\",{children:\"The Pendulum\"})}),\"). Below is a diagram demonstrating the tides of a high followed by a settling back down. This links to getting back to The Calm of The Pendulum.\"]}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"img\",{alt:\"A healthy nervous system\",className:\"framer-image\",\"data-framer-asset\":\"data:framer/asset-reference,FgKy9pCAKoKzYSh47VMcSY9Lhmw.jpg\",\"data-framer-height\":\"563\",\"data-framer-width\":\"1000\",height:\"281\",src:\"https://framerusercontent.com/images/FgKy9pCAKoKzYSh47VMcSY9Lhmw.jpg\",style:{aspectRatio:\"1000 / 563\"},width:\"500\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"(Levine, Ogden, Siegel)\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"When we\\xa0experience a difficulty through trauma and/or unmet attachment needs this can really unbalance our nervous system. Our senses are heightened and our experiences and reactions are typically intensified and strategies are less readily\\xa0accessible to us.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"We see 100% of only 10% of the picture. It feels like we have 100% clarity but we are experiencing the intensity of tunnel vision. This can be overwhelming. A tough patch shrinks our window of\\xa0tolerance meaning we have less capacity to ebb and flow and a greater tendency to become overwhelmed more quickly. Learning how to track and shift our affect can be a powerful tool for promoting regulation and\\xa0integration in our emotional system and body.\\xa0\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"h2\",{children:\"Hyperarousal, calm arousal, and hypoarousal.\\xa0\\xa0\"}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"ul\",{style:{\"--framer-font-size\":\"14px\",\"--framer-text-color\":\"rgb(129, 129, 129)\"},children:[/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Calm arousal is the ideal state and that most times during the day we fluctuate within various levels of calm arousal.\\xa0 However, when we become too over-stimulated (fear, pain, anger, trauma triggers etc) to the degree that it pushes us outside of our window of\\xa0tolerance this is hyperarousal.\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Calm arousal is the ideal state and that most times during the day we fluctuate within various levels of calm arousal.\\xa0 However, when we become too over-stimulated (fear, pain, anger, trauma triggers etc) to the degree that it pushes us outside of our window of\\xa0tolerance this is hyperarousal. \\xa0\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:[/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Hyperarousal is characterized by excessive activation/energy often in the form of anxiety, panic,\\xa0fear, hypervigilence, emotional flooding etc. This keeps our system stuck on and impacts our ability to relax, often making it difficult to sleep, eat and digest food, and\\xa0optimally manage our emotions. At the most intensified level this may result in dissociative rage/hostility.\\xa0\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})})]})]}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[\"With reference to\\xa0\",/*#__PURE__*/e(i,{href:{pathVariables:{Vu_MjvNyj:\"on-bereavement\"},unresolvedPathSlugs:{Vu_MjvNyj:{collectionId:\"Dp6iOgS4Q\",collectionItemId:\"owI9FAIXD\"}},webPageId:\"FLZVLRIW6\"},openInNewTab:!1,smoothScroll:!1,children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"a\",{children:\"my blog on bereavement\"})}),\", we can only tolerate so much pain, loss, anxiety, fear etc before the brain and body respond and numb us to this excessive energy. Similarly, people will only stay in a shutdown state feeling emotionally deadened inside before the brain/body shifts us out of this often by gravitating towards\\xa0(often subconsciously)\\xa0things that make us feel alive. For some people who have big mood swings this could mean gravitating towards high-risk behaviours or activities uncharacteristic for them to bring about a sense of excitement, activation, and vitality. This is an example of swinging quickly from the low of the pendulum into the high and why it is so important to come out of the low slowly.\"]}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Many people will describe feeling that they are not their usual self. They know that they don\u2019t feel okay but without having experienced regulation in infancy and childhood or following unresolved traumatic experiences that remain activated in the brain and body people may grow up in a manner that they don\u2019t know how to self-regulate.\\xa0Instead, people often attempt to self-regulate and bring themselves into an optimal/calm arousal level any way that they can,\\xa0without\\xa0even knowing this is what they are trying to do.\\xa0\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"For example, someone with excessive fear may gravitate towards a\\xa0depressant to calm their\\xa0brain and nervous system whereas someone feeling emotionally deadened may gravitate towards a stimulant to make them feel alive.\\xa0\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Understanding the function of how people are responding and what may be needed to effectively shift this emotional state is critical for finding effective strategies to shift arousal that don\u2019t lead to further harm to self or others or leave the individual with a sense of shame.\\xa0This can be referred to as a false refuge in that it provides the \u201Cillusion\u201D that it is helping but in the end the problem is still there and may be even bigger now, layered with shame, guilt, a sense of failure etc.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[\"A \u201Ctrue refuge\u201D is something we do for ourselves that effectively allows us to shift towards our optimal arousal zone while building competencies and taking care of ourselves in a manner that feels good.\\xa0\",/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{}),\"Parents, carers and teachers/staff can help by noticing; \u201CIt looks like you are feeling overwhelmed, why don\u2019t we take a break\u201D etc. \\xa0\"]}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Dan Siegel refers to this as \u201Cname it to tame it\u201D. Naming it allows for a sense of understanding and being seen as well as validation. When we stop to notice (within\\xa0ourselves or others) this can be a powerful\\xa0grounding tool. Children, young people and adults should be encouraged to\\xa0focus mindfully on noticing how they feel, how their body feels, and identifying what they need to feel right again. Our goal is essentially to broaden\\xa0this\\xa0window of tolerance\\xa0increasing\\xa0capacity for people to hold emotional experiences (even intense ones) without become dysregulated or going into a state of hyper or hypo arousal.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[\"Working with the window of tolerance and The Pendulum (\",/*#__PURE__*/e(i,{href:{pathVariables:{Vu_MjvNyj:\"the-pendulum\"},unresolvedPathSlugs:{Vu_MjvNyj:{collectionId:\"Dp6iOgS4Q\",collectionItemId:\"o6Tep3Tx9\"}},webPageId:\"FLZVLRIW6\"},openInNewTab:!1,smoothScroll:!1,children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"a\",{children:\"see blog post\\xa0The Pendulum\"})}),\") in conjunction with each other in therapy can be life changing.\"]}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[\"If you'd like to find out more, then do \",/*#__PURE__*/e(i,{href:\"https://brighton-counselling.co.uk/contact\",openInNewTab:!1,smoothScroll:!1,children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"a\",{children:\"get in touch\"})}),\" and we can have an initial chat free of charge.\"]})]})},{index:6,id:\"SKXnO35n9\",[o]:\"On Supervision \u2013 a blog for Practitioners\",[s]:\"on-supervision-a-blog-for-practitioners\",[l]:d({src:\"https://framerusercontent.com/images/jz9ZyuvAGQRppjjxhvM3RC591aI.jpg\",srcSet:\"https://framerusercontent.com/images/jz9ZyuvAGQRppjjxhvM3RC591aI.jpg?scale-down-to=512 512w, https://framerusercontent.com/images/jz9ZyuvAGQRppjjxhvM3RC591aI.jpg 850w\"},\"Counselling supervision\"),[h]:\"Ideally we come to Supervision with trust and an openness that we can speak candidly about challenges in client work openly...\",[c]:/*#__PURE__*/t(r.Fragment,{children:[/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"I have worked as a Clinical Supervisor with a range of supervisees over the last 10 years, with supervisees in training on placement, and more experienced counsellors, in groups of three and four as well as one-to-one Clinical Supervision.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"In supervision the relationship created with the supervisee is key, just as the relationship between client and counsellor is of central focus to the movement of the therapeutic work. When a counsellor comes to supervision they may be feeling anxious, stressed, maybe confused or overwhelmed. It is important to create a space where it feels safe enough to talk about difficult feelings without fearing judgement and to be able to acknowledge and discuss them.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"em\",{children:\"\u2018The task of the supervisor is to help the supervisee feel received, valued, understood on the assumption that only then will he feel safe enough and open enough to review and challenge himself, as well as to value himself and his own abilities.\u2019 (Hawkins and Shohet; 1989, 36)\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Supervisors can obviously be experienced as in a position of authority and power. This needs to be held in mind when working together as it \\xa0can bring out a defensiveness or one down position in the supervisee who wants to prove to their supervisor and themselves that they are doing a good job. \\xa0\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[\"In short, I need to hold a balance between genuine warmth and the need to challenge thought processes and practice. An acknowledgement Our relationship can act as a useful reflection of the client/counsellor that there is no one way to interpret information and that our purpose is co-operative rather than\\xa0\",/*#__PURE__*/e(\"em\",{children:\"\u2019\"}),\"from above\u2019 with a respect for the role of boundaries. This is encapsulated by the following quote:\"]}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[/*#__PURE__*/e(\"em\",{children:\"\u2018\u2026an integrated style of supervision. We are not only advocating integration of the educative, supportive and managerial roles, but also a supervisory approach which is relationship based\u2019.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"em\",{children:\"(Hawkins and Shohet; 1989, 5)\"})]}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[\"My view of good supervision is that it focuses predominantly on the client. The dynamics of the supervisee will come into the process but the exploration of this will be with the client in mind. We examine the issues brought by the client in order to move the work forward in his or her best interests. It is as if part of the work of the supervisor is to \u2018speak the unspoken\u2019, not to be \u2018\",/*#__PURE__*/e(\"em\",{children:\"mesmerized\u2019\\xa0\"}),\"by the supervisee or the client.\\xa0\",/*#__PURE__*/e(\"em\",{children:\"(Houston; 1990,38)\"})]}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[\"Hawkins and Shohet draw together the qualities of a good supervisor as follows:\\xa0\",/*#__PURE__*/e(\"em\",{children:\"\u2018empathy, understanding, unconditional positive regard, congruence, genuineness (Rogers 1957), warmth and self-disclosure (Coche 1977), flexibility, concern, attention, investment, curiosity and openness (Albott 1984; Aldridge 1982; Gittermann and Millier 1977; Hess 1980.)\"}),\"\\xa0\"]}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"I use the various definitions and recommendations from the different modalities on the basis that they work, suit my style of relating, suit the environment in which I find myself and all are there ultimately to promote healing in the client via their encounter with their counsellor, my supervisee.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"h2\",{children:\"The difference between Supervision and Therapy\"}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{}),\"Supervision uses the same set of skills as client work, but the supervisor must be clear about how it is different in content, focus and boundaries. The supervisory relationship is more collaborative, more of a partnership, more equal, depending upon the needs of the supervisee and their clients.\"]}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Therapy is a place where social limitations are removed, we nudge the client forward, challenging them, supporting them and taking them to a place they have not been or do not know how to get to. This in turn is reflected in the supervision process where the supervisee is challenged to better serve the client. In therapy we ask our client, are we talking about the right thing? \\xa0In supervision we ask the supervisee what is it that this client wants from counselling? We hold this in mind.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"em\",{children:\"\u2018Therapy is essentially about healing, the healing of wounds, and this healing will only take place if the therapist is willing to take the risk of meeting, which Martin Buber (1958) calls the \u2018I-thou\u2019 relationship. When this willingness for meeting is present, this very possibility for meeting creates the quality of relationship in which healing can occur.\u2019 (Jacobs; 1996, 64)\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[\"In supervision there is generally more open dialogue and essentially more challenge.\\xa0 In essence if it\u2019s \u2018coming up\u2019 for the supervisor then it is\\xa0useful to say it\",/*#__PURE__*/e(\"em\",{children:\". (Houston 1990)\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\"})]}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"em\",{children:\"\\xa0 \\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"By contrast, in therapy it may be more appropriate to hold the thought but not verbalize it. In supervision we discuss transference, counter-transference and the parallel process overtly. \\xa0A definition of the parallel process is neatly described by Michael Jacobs:\"}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[/*#__PURE__*/e(\"em\",{children:\"\u2018Whereby it is thought that the dynamics of the therapy relationship can be replicated within the supervisory relationship.\u2019\"}),\" (Jacobs; 1996,2)\"]}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"As an example, a supervisee may come over in a completely different way when talking about a particular client, inadvertently \u2018demonstrating\u2019 the client with great accuracy.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"em\",{children:\"\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0 ^\\xa0 ^\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"em\",{children:\"Client\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0 :\\xa0\\xa0 :\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0 supervisee\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"em\",{children:\"Counsellor\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0 :\\xa0\\xa0 :\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0 supervisor\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0\\xa0 parallel process (echo)\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[\"As supervisors we work with one foot in and one foot out of the supervisory relationship with the supervisee. We keep a \u2018birds eye view\u2019, using \u2018\",/*#__PURE__*/e(\"em\",{children:\"helicopter ability\u2019\"}),\"\\xa0to be able to focus on the client being described, whilst being able to switch perspectives and focus on the supervisee and their process., and also our own.\\xa0\",/*#__PURE__*/e(\"em\",{children:\"(Hawkins and Shohet; 1989, 37)\\xa0\"})]}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[\"We keep a \",/*#__PURE__*/e(\"em\",{children:\"third eye\"}),\" on the work in order not to get pulled in by the supervisee. \",/*#__PURE__*/e(\"em\",{children:\"(Houston 1990; 36)\"})]}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"h2\",{children:\"What are the crucial tasks of supervision?\"}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"em\",{children:\"\u2018The supervisor\u2019s role is not just to reassure the worker, but to allow the emotional disturbance to be felt within the safer setting of the supervisory relationship, where it can be survived, reflected upon and learnt from. Supervision thus provides a container that holds the helping relationship within the \u2018therapeutic triad\u2019: supervisor; supervisee; client.\u2019\\xa0 (Hawkins and Shohet ;1989, 3)\"})]}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"A supervisee needs to be able to trust their supervisor in order to be able to talk about ruptures in the work, stuck points, transference and countertransference. These are all crucial tasks of supervision, the bringing of issues that are not going well.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"It is important to have a truly non-judgemental stance which enables supervisees to be honest about their difficulties with their clients. This is fundamental because supervisees can so easily feel judged or incompetent when the client\u2019s circumstances or their own response is challenging or ambivalent. The danger is the tendency to underplay or not reveal these rather than seeing that it is in our difficulties that we learn. In turn, I need to be open and honest in order to foster trust in supervisees.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Supervision needs to strike the balance between an informal and a structured approach as it is important that supervisees feel comfortable and safe enough to raise anything that is a concern to them, but, as outlined above, supervision has a clear purpose and focus \u2013 the client.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"When working for an agency, supervision needs to be \u2018owned\u2019 by both the organization and the individual; a supervision policy will lay out the purpose, frequency and format of supervision so that it maximizes professional development in addition to checking the quantity and quality of work.\\xa0\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"h2\",{children:\"My own style of supervising.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{}),\"Development in my role as a supervisor includes the development of my personal supervisory style. I would describe myself as being open, spontaneous, having a sense of humour and an ease with supervisees.\\xa0\"]}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"I encourage the collaborative nature of the supervisory relationship, both one-to-one and in a group and find it refreshing that it is my responsibility to ensure that the group is challenging in a way that moves the work to a deeper level, both within the room and then subsequently with the client.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Part of my style is to be open to feedback. I believe that if I am prepared to be open about my flaws then a supervisee is more likely to be able to discuss their anxieties or fears.\\xa0 I want a new supervisee, or a supervisee with a new client to be able to share any difficulties and not clam up for fear that they may get it \u2018wrong\u2019 or will not be able to find the \u2018right thing to say\u2019.\\xa0\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"I incorporate elements of my current supervisor\u2019s style into how I work. We wonder and are curious together. I remind myself to be quiet, sit back, listen, wait before entering into a dialogue. I also have to remind myself not to reassure or rescue. If a new supervisee is too grateful or too apologetic, I question this and what it means.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"I bear in mind the need to heed my internal supervisor. As I listen to the presentations I ask myself, what is happening here? How am I feeling? What are my body responses?\\xa0 What is my intuition telling me?\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"I reflect more than I pose questions. Statements are often more honest than requests for answers and allow for a more reflective response. I also do my best to respect difference in terms of different styles of working and discuss this openly. As well as discussion, I find it useful to use role play and two chair work.\\xa0\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"This can be particularly useful if a supervisee seems to be having difficulty in relating to a client. The responses from other members of the group are also valuable and model the need for close observation of body language, timbre of voice and choice of language itself. The immediacy of the Gestalt approach is very effective in promoting a deep bodily understanding of what is happening both within the supervision group and within the client/counsellor dynamic.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"strong\",{children:\"Testimonial from Jane Fior, Cancer Counselling London\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"\u201CNicky has a very useful varied background as well as her counselling experience and training. She operates ethically and has a truly non-judgemental stance which will enable her supervisees to be honest about their difficulties when talking about their clients. This is of fundamental importance because supervisees can easily feel judged or incompetent when the client\u2019s circumstances or their own response is challenging or ambivalent. The danger is the tendency to underplay/not reveal these rather than seeing that it is in our difficulties that we learn. Her openness and honesty will foster trust in her supervisees and her awareness of the terrain will provide the management of the service with the necessary confidence in her ability to be both responsible in relation to her supervisees and to the management of the service itself.\u201D\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[\"Read more about my \",/*#__PURE__*/e(i,{href:{webPageId:\"PMJM7bS8s\"},openInNewTab:!1,smoothScroll:!1,children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"a\",{children:\"clinical supervision services\"})}),\" and testimonials.\"]})]})},{index:7,id:\"owI9FAIXD\",[o]:\"On bereavement\",[s]:\"on-bereavement\",[l]:d({src:\"https://framerusercontent.com/images/mNKeSZWDkuFLPNoXPPdPA5tsyA.jpg\",srcSet:\"https://framerusercontent.com/images/mNKeSZWDkuFLPNoXPPdPA5tsyA.jpg?scale-down-to=512 512w, https://framerusercontent.com/images/mNKeSZWDkuFLPNoXPPdPA5tsyA.jpg 850w\"},\"Bereavement\"),[h]:\"Bereavement counselling is a space to honour the person who has died and the feelings around that loss be it anger or sorrow... \",[c]:/*#__PURE__*/t(r.Fragment,{children:[/*#__PURE__*/e(\"h2\",{children:\"\u201COn bereavement\u201D for clients and some techniques used for practitioners and clients\"}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{}),\"\u201CEach person\u2019s grief is as unique as their fingerprint. But what everyone has in common is that no matter how they grieve, they share a need for their grief to be witnessed. That doesn\u2019t mean needing someone to try to lessen it or reframe it for them. The need is for someone to be fully present to the magnitude of their loss without trying to point out the silver lining.\u201D \",/*#__PURE__*/e(\"em\",{children:\"\u2013 David Kessler\"})]}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"In this blog I would like to look at ways that your unique bereavement or loss can be honoured and\\xa0worked through in counselling and how the counsellor\\xa0 can bear witness by standing alongside you in this\\xa0 process.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"h2\",{children:\"What is complex grief?\"}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{}),\"What is complex grief? If a person close to you, that you had a close relationship with, dies, there is acute grief. A state of acute emotional distress. A state in which the reality of the loss intrudes into awareness, accompanied by intense pain and, at other moments, is hidden behind a thick wall of disbelief. Gradually, you may or may not\\xa0 be able to adapt\\xa0 to\\xa0 the reality that the other person is gone forever.\"]}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Over time and this may be a longer time for some people than others, you may get more room for new activities and new relationships. We can grow around grief. The size of the loss does not necessarily change but the room around it can expand.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"img\",{alt:\"Useful tips\",className:\"framer-image\",\"data-framer-asset\":\"data:framer/asset-reference,xUDJzoPHYuNfVCtKygRyUo1Uk.jpg\",\"data-framer-height\":\"540\",\"data-framer-width\":\"960\",height:\"270\",src:\"https://framerusercontent.com/images/xUDJzoPHYuNfVCtKygRyUo1Uk.jpg\",style:{aspectRatio:\"960 / 540\"},width:\"480\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Image \\xa9 AYA\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"We can speak of disturbed or \u201Ccomplex grief\u201D if the state of acute emotional distress persists. If the bereaved person continues to experience disbelief about the irreversibility of the loss. If the death still feels as something that happened yesterday, even when months or years already passed since the loss. It may be that your emotional life is still overwhelmed by the pain and the reverberations of grief.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"The main goal of most grief counselling is to help the client integrate the reality of their loss into their life going forward, and helping them to maintain a healthy bond to the loved one they lost (Neimeyer, 2013). According to Dr. Robert A. Neimeyer, an active clinical psychologist and expert in grief therapy, there are two important first steps for working with a new client reeling from their loss:\"}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"ol\",{style:{\"--framer-font-size\":\"14px\",\"--framer-text-alignment\":\"start\",\"--framer-text-color\":\"rgb(129, 129, 129)\",\"--framer-text-transform\":\"none\"},children:[/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[\"Processing the Event Story of the Death\",/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{}),\"Counsellors working with a bereaved client will first encourage the client to engage in a healing re-telling of the loss. The counsellor must create a safe space for the client to open up and build trust, so when the time comes to help the client rewrite the story of their loss, they are able to communicate effectively having built\\xa0 a relationship with their\\xa0 counsellor.\"]})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Accessing the Back Story of the Relationship\"})})]}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[\"In addition to hearing about the loss event itself, the counsellor will also learn about the client\u2019s relationship with the loved one they lost. As Neimeyer says, \u201CDeath may end a life, but not necessarily a relationship.\u201D The counsellor will guide the client through learning how to reconstruct their bond with their loved one rather than relinquishing it \",/*#__PURE__*/e(\"em\",{children:\"(Neimeyer, 2013)\"}),\".\"]}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[/*#__PURE__*/e(\"strong\",{children:\"Techniques used in Grief Counselling\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{}),\"Three of the biggest things a good grief counsellor can do for their client are to:\"]}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"ol\",{style:{\"--framer-font-size\":\"14px\",\"--framer-text-alignment\":\"start\",\"--framer-text-color\":\"rgb(129, 129, 129)\",\"--framer-text-transform\":\"none\"},children:[/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Let them talk about the person who has died; ask them about the person, and allow them to speak about their lost loved one in a safe space.\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Distinguish grief from trauma; if the client is struggling to get an image out of their head or experiencing flashbacks to the moment they learned of their loved one\u2019s death, they are\\xa0experiencing trauma, which can keep them from working through their grief.\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Deal with any guilt they are feeling and help them organize the grief; the client may feel guilty about what they did or didn\u2019t do while their loved one was alive, or they may feel guilty about not feeling \u201Csad enough\u201D or moving on while their loved one is dead. Encourage them to let go of the guilt and commit to living a life that will honour the person who has died, even if that means forgetting about them for a little while (Tyrrell, n.d.).\"})})]}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[/*#__PURE__*/e(\"strong\",{children:\"Interventions and Strategies in Grief Therapy\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{}),\"Aside from the three important techniques listed above, there are many other more specific interventions and modified strategies that can be used to support a client in grief therapy. For example, Dr. Alan D. Wolfelt developed the Companioning Model of Bereavement caregiving, in which the counsellor acts as a companion and helper for the client. They are present for their client, observing their experience; however, \u201Cobserve\u201D in this context doesn\u2019t mean just watching, but bearing witness to their experience and to watch out for them.\"]}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Companioning is about\u2026\"}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"ul\",{style:{\"--framer-font-size\":\"14px\",\"--framer-text-alignment\":\"start\",\"--framer-text-color\":\"rgb(129, 129, 129)\",\"--framer-text-transform\":\"none\"},children:[/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Honouring the spirit, not focusing on the intellect.\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Curiosity, not expertise.\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Learning from others, not teaching them.\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Walking alongside, not leading.\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Being still, not frantic movement forward.\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Discovering the gifts of sacred silence, not about filling every painful moment with words.\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Listening with the heart, not analysing with the head.\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Bearing witness to the struggles of others, not directing them.\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Being present to another person\u2019s pain, not taking away the pain.\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Respecting disorder and confusion, not imposing order and logic.\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Going to the wilderness of the soul with another human being, not thinking you are responsible for finding the way out (Wheeler-Roy & Amyot, 2004).\"})})]}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Following this model, the counsellor will:\"}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"ul\",{style:{\"--framer-font-size\":\"14px\",\"--framer-text-alignment\":\"start\",\"--framer-text-color\":\"rgb(129, 129, 129)\",\"--framer-text-transform\":\"none\"},children:[/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Listen in a supportive manner to the client\u2019s concerns.\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Help disaster survivors recognize that, in most cases, their emotional reactions are natural, normal, and to be expected.\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Assist survivors to reduce additional stress by organizing and prioritizing day-to-day and recovery-related tasks.\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Help individuals to understand and recognize the wide range of reactions to trauma, such as numbness, frustration, confusion, anger,\\xa0anxiety, sadness, and feelings of helplessness.\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Assist individuals to draw on their own strengths and develop healthy coping mechanisms that permit them to gradually resume their pre-disaster (or pre-loss) level of functioning.\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Sensitively and caringly help individuals to grieve their losses in their own unique ways.\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Systematically draw upon an array of recovery resources for appropriate referrals (Wheeler-Roy & Amyot, 2004)\"})})]}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Dr. Kenneth Doka recommends encouraging clients to use rituals to connect with their loved one and carry on despite their grief. These four types of rituals can help:\"}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"ol\",{style:{\"--framer-font-size\":\"14px\",\"--framer-text-alignment\":\"start\",\"--framer-text-color\":\"rgb(129, 129, 129)\",\"--framer-text-transform\":\"none\"},children:[/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Rituals of Continuity \u2013 These rituals establish that the lost loved one is still a part of the client\u2019s life, that the bond is still there.\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Rituals of Transition \u2013 This type of ritual marks a significant change that has occurred in the grief response, such as cleaning out the room of the deceased or donating their belongings.\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Rituals of Affirmation \u2013 In this ritual, the client can discharge any built-up regret by\\xa0writing a letter\\xa0or a poem to the deceased thanking them for their love and support.\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Rituals of Intensification \u2013 These rituals connect group members and reinforce their common identity; a military unit may gather periodically to remember their fallen comrades or the survivors of an act of violence may revisit the site and place flowers or erect a memorial to those they lost (Wheeler-Roy & Amyot, 2004).\"})})]}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Smaller, everyday rituals can also be helpful for those grieving a loss; these are called Rituals to Commemorate, and include things like lighting a candle and thinking of the loved one, watching home videos or going through old pictures of the loved one, traveling to a place the loved one always wanted to visit, or visiting the burial site and leaving a tribute or symbolic item, like flowers or a balloon.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"The mental health professional will not always encourage or apply\\xa0the same techniques\\xa0equally; there are a million different ways to grieve, and every healthy method of grieving is valid. However, there are two poles in grieving, with people falling anywhere on the spectrum between. The poles are \u201CIntuitive Griever\u201D and \u201CInstrumental Griever.\u201D\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"The Intuitive Griever experiences feelings associated with their grief intensely and is open with expressions of their grief (e.g., crying, lamenting their loss). For them, successful strategies to cope with their grief involve facilitating their experience and expressing their feelings.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"They may experience prolonged periods of confusion, inability to concentrate, disorganization, and disorientation, and they might also suffer from physical exhaustion and/or anxiety.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[\"On the other hand, the Instrumental Griever is more prone to thoughts of grief than feelings of grief and is often reluctant to talk about their feelings. They prioritize mastery of themselves and their environment and find success in problem-solving strategies. They may experience brief periods of cognitive dysfunction, like confusion, forgetfulness, and obsessiveness, and they may have increased energy levels \",/*#__PURE__*/e(\"em\",{children:\"(Wheeler-Roy & Amyot, 2004)\"}),\".\"]}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"h2\",{children:[\"Tips for Coping with Grief\",/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})]}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"In addition to the techniques and strategies listed above, counsellors will likely also offer the following three tips for those who are grieving.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[/*#__PURE__*/e(\"strong\",{children:\"1. Do not grieve alone\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{}),\"It\u2019s vital that you stay connected with others during this time. Your support system may include your family, friends, leaders in your faith, a bereavement support group, and/or a licensed mental health professional to help you cope.\"]}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Your support system can help you:\"}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"ul\",{style:{\"--framer-font-size\":\"14px\",\"--framer-text-alignment\":\"start\",\"--framer-text-color\":\"rgb(129, 129, 129)\",\"--framer-text-transform\":\"none\"},children:[/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Make the funeral arrangements or help you with new responsibilities.\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Find peace and comfort through your faith\u2019s mourning rituals.\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Share your grief with others who can relate.\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Work through your difficult emotions in a safe setting.\"})})]}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[/*#__PURE__*/e(\"strong\",{children:\"2. Take good care of yourself\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{}),\"It can be easy to forget about our own needs when we are reeling from loss, but neglecting yourself won\u2019t help you effectively deal with your grief.\"]}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Remember to:\"}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"ul\",{style:{\"--framer-font-size\":\"14px\",\"--framer-text-alignment\":\"start\",\"--framer-text-color\":\"rgb(129, 129, 129)\",\"--framer-text-transform\":\"none\"},children:[/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Do something creative to express your feelings (e.g., write something, paint, put together a scrapbook, or play a musical instrument).\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Eat, sleep, and exercise to avoid adding physical fatigue to your emotional fatigue.\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Be patient with yourself and allow yourself to feel whatever you feel.\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Understand what triggers your grief and prepare for those triggers (e.g., plan to take a day or two off of work, let your friends and family know you\u2019ll need extra support, etc.).\"})})]}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"h2\",{children:\"Seek professional grief counselling\"}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{}),\"Not everyone will need the services of a counsellor or therapist during their grieving period, but it can be very helpful for those who are really struggling. A qualified professional can help you understand the grief process and give you the tools you need to cope with your emotions (Therapy Tribe, n.d.).\"]}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"While everyone grieves differently, these three tips are essential for anyone who must cope with a profound loss.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"img\",{alt:\"Dual process model\",className:\"framer-image\",\"data-framer-asset\":\"data:framer/asset-reference,6kh2L7xbFxo3DRaUMx0B7D9fk.jpg\",\"data-framer-height\":\"540\",\"data-framer-width\":\"960\",height:\"270\",src:\"https://framerusercontent.com/images/6kh2L7xbFxo3DRaUMx0B7D9fk.jpg\",style:{aspectRatio:\"960 / 540\"},width:\"480\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Image \\xa9 AYA\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[\"If you'd like to find out more, then do \",/*#__PURE__*/e(i,{href:\"https://brighton-counselling.co.uk/contact\",openInNewTab:!1,smoothScroll:!1,children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"a\",{children:\"get in touch\"})}),\" and we can have an initial chat free of charge.\"]})]})},{index:8,id:\"oGQyZLIrT\",[o]:\"Working together online\",[s]:\"working-together-online\",[l]:d({src:\"https://framerusercontent.com/images/2u9ztatZ2GxMGUbkivl99zYqRE.jpg\",srcSet:\"https://framerusercontent.com/images/2u9ztatZ2GxMGUbkivl99zYqRE.jpg?scale-down-to=512 512w, https://framerusercontent.com/images/2u9ztatZ2GxMGUbkivl99zYqRE.jpg 820w\"},\"Working creatively\"),[h]:\"One good outcome of the pandemic has been establishing the effectiveness of online counselling. This enables us to meet and work together wherever you are via zoom...\",[c]:/*#__PURE__*/t(r.Fragment,{children:[/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"There are many ways that we can work together online. By screensharing we can introduce Gestalt Art Therapy and working with different parts of self.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"img\",{alt:\"Gestalt chair work\",className:\"framer-image\",\"data-framer-asset\":\"data:framer/asset-reference,oksZwx9HxaqCCb6Xhs6UwDQ4pxY.jpg\",\"data-framer-height\":\"540\",\"data-framer-width\":\"960\",height:\"270\",src:\"https://framerusercontent.com/images/oksZwx9HxaqCCb6Xhs6UwDQ4pxY.jpg\",style:{aspectRatio:\"960 / 540\"},width:\"480\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[/*#__PURE__*/e(\"strong\",{children:\"Gestalt chair work\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{}),\"Think of a polarity that you would like to work on. For example the part of you that feels confident about being able to achieve something and perhaps another part of self which needs to be attended to.\\xa0Perhaps with a sense of uncertainty and self doubt. Choose a coloured ball to represent each part.\"]}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"img\",{alt:\"Using polarities\",className:\"framer-image\",\"data-framer-asset\":\"data:framer/asset-reference,l2ebb6CjEINm8QGGORytkQ0zOU.jpg\",\"data-framer-height\":\"540\",\"data-framer-width\":\"960\",height:\"270\",src:\"https://framerusercontent.com/images/l2ebb6CjEINm8QGGORytkQ0zOU.jpg\",style:{aspectRatio:\"960 / 540\"},width:\"480\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[/*#__PURE__*/e(\"strong\",{children:\"Two chairs \u2013 using polarities\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{}),\"On the one hand, say for example the pink ball represents the part that has a sense of confidence. On the other hand the blue ball represents the uncertainty. We might then develop a dialogue between these two parts in the counselling session.\"]}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"img\",{alt:\"Russian Dolls\",className:\"framer-image\",\"data-framer-asset\":\"data:framer/asset-reference,lUBU2Ni6jYiHMr7XddqvqeQIllk.jpg\",\"data-framer-height\":\"540\",\"data-framer-width\":\"960\",height:\"270\",src:\"https://framerusercontent.com/images/lUBU2Ni6jYiHMr7XddqvqeQIllk.jpg\",style:{aspectRatio:\"960 / 540\"},width:\"480\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[/*#__PURE__*/e(\"strong\",{children:\"Russian Dolls\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{}),\"Everyone has multiple layers to their identity; a bit like an onion. Russian dolls can provide a really useful tool when trying to illustrate these layers with clients. They can then be connected back to two chair work when wanting to perhaps have a dialogue between two of those different layers, parts of self or ages for example.\"]}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"img\",{alt:\"Art therapy\",className:\"framer-image\",\"data-framer-asset\":\"data:framer/asset-reference,IIIuhWs134qXiq93VsRXA49Qs.jpg\",\"data-framer-height\":\"540\",\"data-framer-width\":\"960\",height:\"270\",src:\"https://framerusercontent.com/images/IIIuhWs134qXiq93VsRXA49Qs.jpg\",style:{aspectRatio:\"960 / 540\"},width:\"480\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[/*#__PURE__*/e(\"strong\",{children:\"Art Therapy\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{}),\"An introduction to Art Therapy. I invite you, the client, to choose a picture. This may be from a collection I share with you or one of your own. We would then use the picture or painting to explore an issue or feelings you are having around an issue or experience or part of self.\"]}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"img\",{alt:\"Tree/pathway\",className:\"framer-image\",\"data-framer-asset\":\"data:framer/asset-reference,OJ7OeMcRrBplmEsOiIpMxsoZdE.jpg\",\"data-framer-height\":\"540\",\"data-framer-width\":\"960\",height:\"270\",src:\"https://framerusercontent.com/images/OJ7OeMcRrBplmEsOiIpMxsoZdE.jpg\",style:{aspectRatio:\"960 / 540\"},width:\"480\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[/*#__PURE__*/e(\"strong\",{children:\"Tree/Pathway\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{}),\"\u201CI am the pathway in the painting. I am looking towards the future along the path in the distance. One thing I sense/feel/see \u2026.\u201D\"]}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"strong\",{children:\"Testimonial for online\\xa0bereavement\\xa0training delivered by myself and colleagues. (AYA Counselling service)\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"\u201CDuring this pandemic year I have attended a number of on-line training sessions all of which have been very different.\\xa0 This was most definitely one of the best ones in terms of welcoming hosts who made me feel like I had a role to play and a contribution to make to the session. The fact that we were asked specifically to keep our videos on was I think a really good thing and created an immediate buy-in. I admit to other training sessions having turned off my video and you definitely feel less involved. The trainers were excellent at engaging people and inviting comments without it feeling like you were put on the spot. Everyone was spoken to by name and the training felt like a meaningful conversation between everyone rather than a lecture style download of information.\u201D\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[\"If you'd like to find out more, then do \",/*#__PURE__*/e(i,{href:\"https://brighton-counselling.co.uk/contact\",openInNewTab:!1,smoothScroll:!1,children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"a\",{children:\"get in touch\"})}),\" and we can have an initial chat free of charge.\"]})]})},{index:9,id:\"IhOFT6ZdE\",[o]:\"The Humanistic Approach to Counselling and Attraction to Hurt\",[s]:\"the-humanistic-approach-to-counselling-and-attraction-to-hurt\",[l]:d({src:\"https://framerusercontent.com/images/7hLwiV5McTea1m2MHOb1bVhJQ.jpg\",srcSet:\"https://framerusercontent.com/images/7hLwiV5McTea1m2MHOb1bVhJQ.jpg?scale-down-to=512 512w, https://framerusercontent.com/images/7hLwiV5McTea1m2MHOb1bVhJQ.jpg 820w\"},\"Humanistic counselling\"),[h]:\"Sometimes, the things we do to protect ourselves turn on us and hurt us. Through counselling we can explore patterns...\",[c]:/*#__PURE__*/t(r.Fragment,{children:[/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Emphasis within the Humanistic Approach to counselling is on personal and professional change and development. We know that some people seem to be further along than perhaps we are and others less so.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"We should not be put off by this. The aim is to keep on our own path of self fulfillment and development, being the best we can possibly be in our lives, the most evolved we can be.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"We should see ourselves as first and foremost healthy, strong and capable not first ill, weak and inadequate. To focus on problems before strength is not validating and it is not effective. We are working towards personal development and change. The most effective way of achieving this is by working with and focusing on the positive in the counselling room. The American novelist William Faulkner, A great influence on CT said first and foremost human beings endure. It is not that problems are being denied they are just not the first stage in working with people in CT and therapy.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[\"Often people are unaware that their past is dictating their present, their everyday lives. This can often become an increasing problem as we get older, the same things cropping up and getting in the way. This can lead to attraction to hurt, when past ways of coping and surviving may still be used although these strategies may now be no longer useful or even damaging. \u201CThese self-protective devices may have outgrown their usefulness. Sometimes, the things we do to protect ourselves turn on us and hurt us.\u201D \",/*#__PURE__*/e(\"em\",{children:\"(Codependency No More by Melody Beattie)\"})]}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"We can hold ourselves back in terms of our own emotional well being and quality of life and also what we have to offer others when we hold onto old patterns of behaviour.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[\"If you'd like to find out more, then do \",/*#__PURE__*/e(i,{href:\"https://brighton-counselling.co.uk/contact\",openInNewTab:!1,smoothScroll:!1,children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"a\",{children:\"get in touch\"})}),\" and we can have an initial chat free of charge.\"]}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"em\",{children:\"Nicky Mark / \u2018Attraction to Hurt\u2019 \\xa9 Peter Fleming, Pellin Institute\\xa0\"})})]})},{index:10,id:\"H2KHaPPAO\",[o]:\"Contribution from Hurt and Attraction to Hurt in the Counselling process\",[s]:\"contribution-from-hurt-and-attraction-to-hurt-in-the-counselling-process\",[l]:d({src:\"https://framerusercontent.com/images/RX9YwNSv5LYGUtwJGDaNp76wv7k.jpg\",srcSet:\"https://framerusercontent.com/images/RX9YwNSv5LYGUtwJGDaNp76wv7k.jpg?scale-down-to=512 512w, https://framerusercontent.com/images/RX9YwNSv5LYGUtwJGDaNp76wv7k.jpg 820w\"},\"Contribution from hurt\"),[h]:\"How Contribution from Hurt is a powerful way of coming through our issues with the help of counselling...\",[c]:/*#__PURE__*/t(r.Fragment,{children:[/*#__PURE__*/e(\"h2\",{children:\"\u201CDeep down underneath it all, where it really counts, you are ok.\u201D\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"(A Guide to Humanistic Psychology-p.6) What a powerful and reassuring statement. If we can really take this on board, what a great bonus already on our journey of personal development in the counselling process. When we go through tough times and remember that \u201Cthis too will pass\u201D really believe it, in our vulnerability we will find our strength.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"In focusing on strength as a technique in the counselling process we come up with the healing force and one of the most significant tools in Contribution Training, or CT \u2018Contribution from Hurt\u2019. It is such a powerful way of coming through our issues if we can learn to give from the place where we are most hurt. We are in fact an expert in the particular field which has hurt us. If we have suffered from anxiety, we are an authority in this area. We have much to offer if we can tap into it.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"The way in which we are hurt therefore has the potential, to be a source of great strength for us. The emphasis in Contribution Training is, in learning how to contribute to others through our hurt and, in so doing we contribute to and heal ourselves. This can be ongoing, a part of our daily lives and relationships, our \u2018Purpose\u2019. The process of contribution is what we do, we develop purpose in what we do. \u201CThe most effective way to strengthen the nourishing core in a person is to discover the particular contribution to others from which that individual derives most satisfaction.\u201D (CT Manual)\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Pellin\u2019s Contribution Training, CT, is both a Humanistic and Integrative counselling approach.. An integral part of CT is the teaching of a set of realistic and applicable tools to counsellors and to clients. This includes listening skills, The Pendulum of our emotions, a sense of purpose, The Life Forces, Feelings of Accomplishment, True Rest, Callousing, Attraction to Hurt , Referrals and Resistance to Change. These tools are taught to practitioners and to clients.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"\u2018Attraction to Hurt\u2019 can draw us into acting in such a way that we perpetuate hurt by what we say or do. We can be drawn to those things, people or types of behaviour that are not good for us. Perhaps we are not able to let go of old friendships that no longer work for us, spend time with the wrong people, addicted to unhealthy relationships. This can prevent us from finding calm and happiness in our lives.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"We need to understand how hurt is passed on from generation to generation, how we can inherit hurt. Then if we are consciously aware, we can choose what we are going to do for the sake of the next generation, for our children. This means being prepared to go on our own therapeutic journey to work out and understand what happened to us. \u201CA child can never see through unconscious manipulation. It is like the air he breathes; he knows no other, and it appears to him to be the only breathable air\u201D (The Drama of being a Child Ch.1 p.24)\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[\"If you'd like to find out more, then do \",/*#__PURE__*/e(i,{href:\"https://brighton-counselling.co.uk/contact\",openInNewTab:!1,smoothScroll:!1,children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"a\",{children:\"get in touch\"})}),\" and we can have an initial chat free of charge.\"]}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"em\",{children:\"Contribution Training \\xa9 Peter Fleming, Pellin Institute\\xa0\"})})]})},{index:11,id:\"myVsjgQjl\",[o]:\"Children and The Pendulum\",[s]:\"children-and-the-pendulum\",[l]:d({src:\"https://framerusercontent.com/images/vLHxvAGzi4QCYqV587odWAJQd7k.jpg\",srcSet:\"https://framerusercontent.com/images/vLHxvAGzi4QCYqV587odWAJQd7k.jpg?scale-down-to=512 512w, https://framerusercontent.com/images/vLHxvAGzi4QCYqV587odWAJQd7k.jpg 820w\"},\"Children and the pendulum\"),[h]:\"If you come to counselling the whole family can benefit. I am systemically trained and we often talk about family dynamics and relationships...\",[c]:/*#__PURE__*/t(r.Fragment,{children:[/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Children are at risk of growing up with a heightened sense of anxiety or potentially an addiction to excitement if they live in a whirlwind of highs and lows. We can teach The Pendulum and the importance of True Rest to children directly. We can guide our own children or the children we teach and look after in how to live in the calm, how to live in the here and now. Hyperactivity in a child can happen as a result of family situations or home life where there is no built-in easing of pendulum swings or \u2018down time\u2019. In using the Calm of the Pendulum and demonstrating ways of \u2018getting into the calm\u2019 such as changing the environment, we can lead by example. To change the environment, to get into the calm, this can be as simple as standing up and walking across the room and sitting down in another chair. In the calm we have our best ability to cope.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"When I was teaching in the primary classroom if things became fraught or there was an incident in the room whoever was able to start first would start to sing the song \u201CStand by me\u201D and this would gradually filter around the room until we were all singing. This may sound rather unbelievable but it happened and it was beautiful. We did Circle Time every day and followed a simplified structure based on how the group would start and a round would be lead on The Pellin Training course.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"The first time was very powerful and exciting. It was an hour until home time and we were breaking up for Christmas. The class parties were over and chaos and hype ran throughout the school. We shut the door sat cross legged in a circle on the carpet and did a simple breathing exercise. I talked about the fact that Christmas can be an exciting time but can also get a bit much with all the hype. I introduced the Pendulum for the first time and then suggested a round based on how you get into the calm when you are feeling all hyper and wound up. I shared some of my feelings and referrals about Christmas and my own personal battle with The Pendulum. I was moved by the way this enabled the children to listen to each other and talk on an emotional and personal level about what was going on for them and what ways of getting \u2018into the calm\u2019 worked for them. This experience resulted in a child volunteering to sit in the middle of the circle and tell the rest of the class about being broken into whilst in bed at home and his fear that \u2018they\u2019 would come back while his mum was in on her own. We all gave him reassuring feedback. It was very moving and bonding.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"As we developed Circle Time individual children would lead the breathing exercise or guided fantasy meditation at the start, developing their own ideas for getting calm.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[/*#__PURE__*/e(\"strong\",{children:\"Here are some examples from 2003 of nine and ten year olds in Islington:\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"em\",{children:\"\u201C\u2026breathing in and out with the sea, go to a place in your mind that makes you feel calm with plenty of space around you\u2026\u201D\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"em\",{children:\"\u201Cwrap yourself in a magic colour and go to a secret place\u2026\u201D\"})]}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[/*#__PURE__*/e(\"strong\",{children:\"Here are some responses to sharing in a round:\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"em\",{children:\"\u201Cit is good to listen to other people and hear how they feel inside.\u201D\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"em\",{children:\"\u201C\u2026being able to be right here, now, how I\u2019m feeling\u2026\u201D\"})]}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"A response to a guided fantasy \u201CI could feel the wind in my hair \u2026\u201D from a boy who smashed a window in the school because he was having difficulty controlling his behaviour.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"I worked with this particular class for two years and despite some extreme behaviour issues amongst the class I was able to give up control, close my eyes and follow the instructions of the child leading the class along with the other children. I am still in touch with many of those children who are now in their mid twenties.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[\"If you'd like to find out more, then do \",/*#__PURE__*/e(i,{href:\"https://brighton-counselling.co.uk/contact\",openInNewTab:!1,smoothScroll:!1,children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"a\",{children:\"get in touch\"})}),\" and we can have an initial chat free of charge.\"]})]})},{index:12,id:\"YxEz0RRzh\",[o]:\"Codependency and Referrals in the Counselling Process\",[s]:\"codependency-and-referrals-in-the-counselling-process\",[l]:d({src:\"https://framerusercontent.com/images/LXF110HeH0rJoovz2VgFr2orVY.jpg\",srcSet:\"https://framerusercontent.com/images/LXF110HeH0rJoovz2VgFr2orVY.jpg?scale-down-to=512 512w, https://framerusercontent.com/images/LXF110HeH0rJoovz2VgFr2orVY.jpg 820w\"},\"Co-dependency\"),[h]:\"When another person\u2019s behaviour has taken over, counselling can identify ways to  regroup and live your own life...\",[c]:/*#__PURE__*/t(r.Fragment,{children:[/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Codependency can also be a form of Attraction to Hurt. A codependent person is someone who has let another person\u2019s behaviour affect him or her, and who is obsessed with controlling them. Whilst focusing on the person they are codependent with, they may look to that person for the answer as to what kind of day it is going to be, how are things now, what do I think of this situation or person. There is infact no \u201CI\u201D in chronic codependency.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"This is a form of Resistance to Nourishing Change. It is often that which we are unaware of, that we subconsciously resist, that we need to have feedback on in order to overcome it or to change. It is unknown to us, it is our \u2018interface\u2019 our learning edge, the part of ourselves that we cannot see although others can. It is the part of ourselves that can \u2018turn people off.\u2019\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Through the concept of Referrals we look at past pain. If I am experiencing a referral it means that something I am having strong feelings about, is also triggering a past memory, an event that raised similar emotions. Referrals can be positive and negative. A Referral Chain is when a series of incidents with which we have significant emotional memories attached, are triggered. This can also result in an \u2018Overwhelming Referral Moment\u2019 which will cause an extreme pendulum swing. If this is connected to anxiety it could cause a panic attack.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"If someone is having a referral chain of happy memories it may be deeply moving or nostalgic. We are constantly living with the referral chains of our past. Negative referrals bring clients to counselling. In order to break patterns of behaviour that are no longer useful or are now bad for us, we need to overcome our referrals, have freedom from our memory triggers of the past. \u2018True freedom is freedom from referrals\u2019. (CT)\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"There are positive Referrals as well as negative ones. The energy that is going into and surrounds a negative referral can be used in the opposite direction, in a positive way. A negative always has the potential to be turned into a positive. A negative has a coating of positive and a positive has an element or layer of negative.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"em\",{children:\"\u2018Referral\u2019 \\xa9 Peter Fleming, Pellin Institute\\xa0\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[\"If you'd like to find out more, then do \",/*#__PURE__*/e(i,{href:\"https://brighton-counselling.co.uk/contact\",openInNewTab:!1,smoothScroll:!1,children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"a\",{children:\"get in touch\"})}),\" and we can have an initial chat free of charge.\"]})]})},{index:13,id:\"IifKhJcck\",[o]:\"Feelings of Accomplishment and Purpose in client work\",[s]:\"feelings-of-accomplishment-and-purpose-in-client-work\",[l]:d({src:\"https://framerusercontent.com/images/yrc5SZ3blplgK1yaz0IK3Kdw2p8.jpg\",srcSet:\"https://framerusercontent.com/images/yrc5SZ3blplgK1yaz0IK3Kdw2p8.jpg?scale-down-to=512 512w, https://framerusercontent.com/images/yrc5SZ3blplgK1yaz0IK3Kdw2p8.jpg 820w\"},\"Feelings of accomplishment\"),[h]:\"Purpose is powerful and the area in which we can best develop. It can determine the flow of our Feelings of Accomplishment...\",[c]:/*#__PURE__*/t(r.Fragment,{children:[/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[/*#__PURE__*/e(\"em\",{children:\"The following post is taken from the work of Peter Fleming, Founder of The Pellin Institute.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{}),\"Contribution Training offers us the ability to turn that which is negative into something positive. The open sharing of hurt can contribute to the other person who can then contribute back to us because they enable us to achieve the \u2018Feelings of Accomplishment\u2019 and purpose that we get from making the contribution.\"]}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Feelings of Accomplishment give us a sense of achievement or satisfaction, a sense of pride. We can get this in small ways and build on the sense that something is being accomplished, reinforcing a sense of wellbeing. When working on Feelings of Accomplishment with a client we focus on strength, finding out from a clients life about a glimmer of a feeling of accomplishment, a hobby, family, work \u2013 something that gives pride.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Purpose is powerful and the area in which we can best develop. It can determine the flow of our Feelings of Accomplishment. There are three types of Purpose in CT, Superficial Underlying and Sustaining purpose. We generally have one or two types of Sustaining Purpose in our lives. Superficial purpose is the focus within a game of tennis for example. We normally have several types of Underlying Purpose, our home, family, marriage, our career.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[\"If you'd like to find out more, then do \",/*#__PURE__*/e(i,{href:\"https://brighton-counselling.co.uk/contact\",openInNewTab:!1,smoothScroll:!1,children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"a\",{children:\"get in touch\"})}),\" and we can have an initial chat free of charge.\"]})]})},{index:14,id:\"GYAn87xRE\",[o]:\"Restructuring in Systemic Family Therapy\",[s]:\"restructuring-in-systemic-family-therapy\",[l]:d({src:\"https://framerusercontent.com/images/M0U6dB62uUsNefaWHhMD1ui3bQ0.jpg\",srcSet:\"https://framerusercontent.com/images/M0U6dB62uUsNefaWHhMD1ui3bQ0.jpg?scale-down-to=512 512w, https://framerusercontent.com/images/M0U6dB62uUsNefaWHhMD1ui3bQ0.jpg 820w\"},\"Systemic Family Therapy\"),[h]:\"Through gestalt interventions such as two chair work, this blog gives a glimpse of systemic family therapy which can inform-one to-one work...\",[c]:/*#__PURE__*/t(r.Fragment,{children:[/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"A family therapist is an active participant in bringing about change within a family, engaging therapeutically in concerns and issues that are causing distress. This will be effective and valued from a structural family therapy viewpoint, if s/he can disrupt or \u2018shake up\u2019 family patterns and behaviour leading to a restructuring over time. \u2018Restructuring\u2019 is defined as \u201Cusing interventions such as enactments, boundary making, unbalancing, creating intensity or reframing to challenge the prevailing family structure\u201D (Carr 2001;102). This essay will therefore look at each of these interventions in order to understand how restructuring works.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Structural Family Therapy was developed by Salvador Minuchin and his colleagues during the 1960s as part of the growing interest in systemic ways of understanding relationship difficulties and individual distress.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Historically the family was seen as creating \u2018the problem\u2019 but this gradually evolved into a new understanding of \u2018not knowing\u2019 where the problem lies. If we are less certain of the position we hold we are more likely to become receptive to other possibilities. This includes the therapist\u2019s position, able to approach the work with a safe uncertainty as to how things are or might become, with no fixed view.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[\"\u201CThe image of the all-knowing, all-powerful therapist who imposes his assumptions on trusting and gullible family members cannot coexist with the previous description of the therapeutic process. Thus, a therapist is an expert who embraces uncertainty, joins families in the adventure of expanding and enriching their ways of relating, and challenges their certainty by helping them see alternative ways of relating\u201D \",/*#__PURE__*/e(\"em\",{children:\"(Minuchin, Nichols and Lee 2007;13)\"}),\".\"]}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[\"A therapist\u2019s initial goal is to be accepted by the family, to form a relationship. In order to do this s/he needs to be alongside, \u2018joining\u2019 the family, becoming part of the system. The therapist aligns themselves with each family member at a time, appearing to be allied with each person but infact remaining neutral. There needs to be an appreciation of what is happening, of the current situation, before seeking to change it. A match has to be made between what the therapist can do with where the family members are at. Change has to be collaborative. \u201C..to join a family, experiencing reality as the family members experience it, and becoming involved in the repeated interactions that form the family structure and shape the way people think and behave. It means to use that joining to become an agent of change who works within the constraints of the family\u2019s system, intervening in ways that are only possible with this particular family\u201D \",/*#__PURE__*/e(\"em\",{children:\"(Minuchin 1981; 2)\"}),\".\"]}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[\"People will keep talking about problems until they feel heard. Restructuring is based on observing and manipulating interactions by the family, suggested by the therapist within a counselling session, either spontaneous behaviour sequences or enactments. Enactment means asking family members to demonstrate a certain interaction or behaviour rather than just talking about it. It can be acted out, perhaps using role play, infront of the therapist who can then make connections between the patterns of behaviour seen, enabling family members to view these connections from a different perspective. \u201CFirstly the therapist starts framing by listening to the family and what is felt to be most relevant \u2013 then to convince family members that the situation can be expanded or modified \u2013 reframed \u2013 using enactment focusing and achieving intensity are successful to therapeutic framing\u201D \",/*#__PURE__*/e(\"em\",{children:\"(Minuchin 1981; 76)\"}),\".\"]}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Restructuring in a session may involve moving people around, a non-verbal intervention, moving someone\u2019s chair away from the family perhaps, suggesting independence or moving a disengaged family member closer to someone else. In order to endeavor to re-structure what is happening within the family dynamic the therapist will use other interventions such as boundary making, unbalancing, creating intensity or reframing to challenge the prevailing family structure, to look at things in a different way. These techniques are all intrinisically linked within the process of restructuring.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Boundary making can help with enmeshed family members such as a parent who is over-involved with a child. A boundary may be introduced or re-enforced to strengthen or change the distance between relationships. An example of unbalancing is \u201Cto change the hierarchical relationship of the members of a subsystem\u201D (Minuchin 1981; 161). A subsystem is a group within the system such as the parents or the children. Unbalancing requires briefly taking sides. Creating intensity may be used by repetition of a message due to the ineffectiveness of an intervention.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"In terms of power and difference in the therapeutic relationship firstly it is necessary for the therapist to hold in mind that s/he is in a position of power, it may also be important to bring this into the room and talk about the client\u2019s view of the dynamic. To presume that we are all equal therefore the issue of power is not there is not true and potentially patronising.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"We are not all compatible. Ideally the therapist needs to be able to refer a client or family to another practitioner in order to have a better match if this is needed. There is a potential limitation to this work if \u2018difference\u2019 is not adequately taken into account.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[\"\u201CUnfortunately, in the process of stepping back to see the system, family therapists sometimes lost sight of the individual human beings that make up a family. Although it isn\u2019t possible to understand people without taking their social context into account, notably the family, it was misleading to limit our focus to the surface of interactions \u2013 to social behaviour divorced from inner experience\u201D \",/*#__PURE__*/e(\"em\",{children:\"(Minuchin, Nichols and Lee 2007;1)\"}),\".\"]}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"When joining with a client or family is difficult the work can become more challenging and less effective. Everyone must feel supported and understood before they can be challenged regardless of their position, this in itself can be very difficult depending on the nature of the client work and the context. Techniques learnt too easily and too quickly could undermine the work. The therapist needs to really know the family and its own idiosyncrasies sufficiently well to earn her/his right to lead. This cannot be rushed. Restructuring cannot work without joining successfully with the family.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"It is important to look at and discuss why patterns of behaviour are being repeated even if the outcome is not desirable. How does this serve the individual or the family, what is being \u2018guarded against\u2019 or defended? Is it so familiar that it is engrained? Are they stuck in old narratives that do not serve them well or even serve any purpose at all. It may be that it is reinforcing the problem. The solution may also perpetuate the problem, take for example overprotective parents, their child could then become dependent on this overprotection.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Reframing when working towards a restructure, involves redefining the problem, taking \u2018the label\u2019 and potentially the judgement away and allowing more capacity for change. Reframing works best when it fits the client\u2019s world view and language creating a relational context for change. Someone described as an \u2018alcoholic\u2019 could be described instead as having an alcohol problem. A \u2018disruptive\u2019 family member could be described as an independent thinker.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[\"\u201CThe new framework must be sufficiently congruent with the client\u2019s or family\u2019s Experience and belief frameworks; otherwise it will be rejected. A reframing would almost inevitably place a positive connotation on behaviour or attitudes which would usually be viewed by the family or others in a more negative way\u201D \",/*#__PURE__*/e(\"em\",{children:\"(Cade1987; 42)\"}),\".\"]}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Guilfoyle\u2019s discourse markers of uncertainty are a form of potential reframing. \u2018I may be wrong about this but\u2026\u2019, \u2018I don\u2019t know but it seems like\u2026\u2019, encouraging the client/family to look at this in a different way whilst empowering them \u2018this might not be quite right but\u2026are you willing to look at it in this way?\u2019\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"\u2018Process not content\u2019 is a useful focus in client work and can be useful when working towards restructuring with a family. If someone is feeling very low for example, it often does not matter what the detail or content is, they will potentially look for evidence that all is not well, look for the negative, if it is not one thing it will be something else, proof will be found.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Staying with the process and not getting pulled into the content/ detail of the client\u2019s work can be key to being able to help and to move things forward.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"It is important not to be too attached to any one model when working one-to-one and with a family. Individual strategies for restructuring are best designed for each situation in a client focussed way rather than the intervention being organized by the model or method of working. Minuchin writes of techniques being there to be mastered and then to be transcended. (1981)\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"To conclude, when looking at restructuring as a process in structural family therapy it is essential to look at each intervention, joining, boundary making, unbalancing, enactment-creating intensity and reframing. They are all intrinsically linked and are aimed at changing the structure of family relationships and dynamics where there is a perceived problem.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[\"If you'd like to find out more, then do \",/*#__PURE__*/e(i,{href:\"https://brighton-counselling.co.uk/contact\",openInNewTab:!1,smoothScroll:!1,children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"a\",{children:\"get in touch\"})}),\" and we can have an initial chat free of charge.\"]}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"strong\",{children:\"Credits\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[/*#__PURE__*/e(\"em\",{children:\"Carr, A. Carr (2001) Family Therapy Concepts Process and Practice: Wiley\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"em\",{children:\"Haley, J. (1976) Problem Solving Therapy. New York: Harper Books/Jossey Bass.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"em\",{children:\"Minuchin, S and Fisherman H.C. (1981) Family Therapy Techniques Cambridge: Harvard University Press.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"em\",{children:\"Minuchin, S Nichols, M and Yung Lee, (2007) Assessing Families and Couples: From Symptom to System Allyn & Bacon\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"em\",{children:\"Cade, B. (1987) Brief/Strategic Approaches to Therapy: A commentary\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"em\",{children:\"A.N.Z J. Fam Ther 8:1 pp. 37-44\"})]})]})},{index:15,id:\"o6Tep3Tx9\",[o]:\"The Pendulum\",[s]:\"the-pendulum\",[l]:d({src:\"https://framerusercontent.com/images/dHGzSFHD50TojraI9dysrld1Qg.jpg\",srcSet:\"https://framerusercontent.com/images/dHGzSFHD50TojraI9dysrld1Qg.jpg?scale-down-to=512 512w, https://framerusercontent.com/images/dHGzSFHD50TojraI9dysrld1Qg.jpg 820w\"},\"The Pendulum\"),[h]:\"Through counselling, an in-depth understanding of the pendulum can make a profound difference to some peoples lives...\",[c]:/*#__PURE__*/t(r.Fragment,{children:[/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"em\",{children:\"The following post is taken from the work of Peter Fleming, Founder of The Pellin Institute.\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[/*#__PURE__*/e(\"strong\",{children:\"Swings of the Pendulum\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{}),\"\u201CThe motion of emotion is like the swing of a pendulum. If the pendulum swings high it will then swing low and even when the pendulum is in the centre, still and calm, it has within it the energy to oscillate back and forth if it is moved. Similar processes are present in emotions. Even when we are calm we can quickly be touched off to swing either to the high side or to the low slide.\u201D\"]}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"img\",{alt:\"The Pendulum\",className:\"framer-image\",\"data-framer-asset\":\"data:framer/asset-reference,77ORysVnKuJAL0yQNdA1hXtgTyM.jpg?preferredSize=full\",\"data-framer-height\":\"563\",\"data-framer-width\":\"1000\",height:\"281\",src:\"https://framerusercontent.com/images/77ORysVnKuJAL0yQNdA1hXtgTyM.jpg\",style:{aspectRatio:\"1000 / 563\"},width:\"500\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"One can be calm, centred in the middle of the pendulum and for example :- unexpectedly friends arrive. In the surprise and pleasure of seeing them and sharing news with them I can quickly become emotionally high, voluble, happy, enthusiastic. For most of us, social occasions are accompanied by pendulum swings. To use another example: I am driving my car, my emotions are relatively stable and quiet, what we will be calling tolerable and I am involved in an accident. My emotions swing high with anger, fear, perhaps guilt and embarrassment. This swing is about what happens to my feelings, not what appears to be happening. I may look calm and yet be very upset, or appear to be very angry and in fact my emotions are still, I am fairly calm.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"h2\",{children:\"Lows\"}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{}),\"The low of the pendulum is the result of a depletion of physical and emotional. You can feel low after a strenuous game of tennis, a swim a long car drive and these can be lows that are in what I call a tolerable area of the low side of the pendulum. Here we can get low without being hurt because we re close to the strength of our calm.\"]}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"A pleasant low can also be a feeling we after seeing a harrowing movie or a good production of a Shakespearian tragedy. The pleasant low can be the martyrdom of feeling that we are working harder than everyone else, or giving more than everyone else and in the low after the working and the giving we can fell rather smug or self-pitying or perhaps both at once.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"The extent that we are going to be hurt by the self-pity or the smugness will depend on how far we swing on the pendulum. The further we swing low the more we are going to get hurt.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"The same situation will apply to the unpleasant, intolerable low. The degree to which we are going to get hurt or hurt others in that low will depend on how deep that low is, and how long that low is. When I swing very low, because of an extreme high, my mind will seduce me into focusing on the hurt around me to the exclusion of the nourishment around me. One way to begin to move out of this dangerous state is to be able to draw on other people, who are not caught up in the negativeness of my low; and who can move me toward doing something that will give me a feeling of accomplishment.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Even when the low feels pleasant, there is still a great temptation to stay there and focus on what I call the \u201Cdown stuff\u201D; the imperfectability of man, the darkness of the night, the selfishness, the meaninglessness of our live, the insignificance, the shortness of our lives, the inevitability of death, the profundity of pessimism and the impossibility of marriage. Some of these feelings can be enjoyable, some of these can be useful to us. What I am saying in Contribution Training is that we need to have an awareness of the process that is happening. When we are low we are not in fact able to evaluate things in a balanced way.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Often in the low, we want to say to ourselves that we are in fact in calm, we are seeing things in balance, when it is clear to an outsider that we are low and being negative. A function of the deep low side of the pendulum is feeling that our negativeness is profound.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"We feel that we are both correct and justified in our negative evaluation. In fact, we have swung low on the pendulum and this is clear to others, while it is in no way clear to us. Eve when someone points out to us that we are low, we do not want to recognise it.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"The Unpleasant Low is a feeling of worthlessness, self hate depression and often guilt. When guilt slips up on us or engulfs us when we are in a low, that low is going to be invariably unpleasant and extremely hard to come out of. A pleasant Low of self pity can become an unpleasant low of depression because we begin in the self pity to feel guilty. Like most married people I can get into feelings of great martyrdom in terms of my relationship with my family. I can get into a low of feeling that I make all the sacrifices, then I can almost enjoy that low of feeling sorry for myself and feeling superior. But then if I begin to feel a sense of guilt because of what I am feeling towards my wife, then I will am going to be quickly flipped over into the unpleasant low of feeling depressed and failure. This guilt can feed on itself, I can begin to remember in the low all the ways I have failed my wife and my family. In the deep pleasant low and guilt, the deep unpleasant low.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"An unpleasant low is going to be harder to get out of than a pleasant low. In unpleasant low we will often feel a great sense of inertia. We will be rejecting of people who want to assist us in moving out of a perhaps dangerous space that we are in.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"People can stay in lows for very long periods of time: days, weeks, months, years. They can come to feel that their life in this low is quite tolerable. Yet they are always on the brink of hurting themselves more and hurting other people more.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"We need to learn to be able to recognise when we are low, how we are low, and how deeply we are low. We need to be able to find ways to come out of these lows. We need to have people around us who have the ability to perceive when we are low and the strength to overcome our resistance to their efforts to help us. We need to find ways that we can get small amounts of feelings of accomplishments when we are low so that we can move towards the tolerable area where we can take responsibility for the space we are in and in an ordinary way do something about it.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"h2\",{children:\"Highs\"}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{}),\"When we are swinging high compulsively and putting out the energy which that swing entails, we can hardly bear to be interrupted in what we are doing. This is one way that we can physically recognise the compulsiveness of the high. When I am high on conversation, I am talking- I am pushing my point across it is almost physically hurtful to stop myself from talking. When someone is swinging high with anger, verbally or physically wanting to lash out at any enemy, to stop the swing and bring the emotions back down towards the calm can be impossible. There are smaller ways in which we can recognise the compulsiveness of the high. I can be high if I am reading and cannot bear to be interrupted; or another high is when, because of my emotional swing I cannot concentrate any of my attention on the page I am reading. The words simply do not fit together into sentences and thoughts, because of the way my pendulum is swinging.\"]}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"The energy rush towards the compulsive high takes away out awareness of where we are, who we are with, what we are doing. The only awareness I can have in the high, is the awareness of the high and in the high it is just about impossible to have an awareness of the strength that lies in the calm. Yet this is precisely the awareness we need if we are going to get too high and get hurt in the high, and then get hurt in the inevitable swing to the low. In the high we need some way of slowly bringing ourselves back a point at a time, into the tolerable area where we can have some choices about where we are going to put our energy. Where we can have some choices about how angry we are going to get, or how high we are going to get, artificially through drinking or drugs, or how high we are going to get in talking with someone who really stimulates us.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"As with the low, where we need someone else to help us find some feelings of accomplishment and slowly move from the deep low into a low that is tolerable, so in the high we often need someone else to point out to us how high we are getting. Yet that interjection when we are swinging high will so often feel to be an intolerable interference. What I am saying here is that we can train ourselves to avoid those extreme highs around which we are going to get hurt.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"h2\",{children:\"The Calm\"}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{}),\"The middle area of the pendulum is the area of the calm. It relates to but is not the same as the complete stillness of a pendulum not moving at all. Our emotions are never this still. Life means a continual movement of our emotions just as it means a continual movement of ourselves and our organs. Without that movement we are dead. Even when we sleep our emotions are in some state of movement, we are dreaming, we are absorbing and digesting the emotional lessons and the emotional pain of the day. Without the emotional calm of the sleep, we would go mad.\"]}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Our true strength, our real health, and our genuine awareness is to be found in the calm. In the low our emotions are turning inwards. Twisting and turning on each other, becoming convoluted, with the mental sabotage that we are alone with these emotions, with these problems and that solutions are not possible. In the low, we can only be aware of ourselves as failure or victims. In the low, our mind functions to convince us that this is the truth, that we are either failure or victims. In this way we are most productive in manufacturing emotional problems which are in fact mainly function of the degree to which we are low on the pendulum, not a function of the content of those problems. If my low is sufficiently low and deep, I can turn my failed marriage into a sincere belief that I have serious problems in intimate relationships, in any long turn relationship with a woman, around sex, around being able to trust other people over a long association. If I continue to stay low, I can feed these problems with new evidence, new guilt, new proof that these problems are the core of my person. However, what may well be happening is I do not have problems that are serious in these areas. However I am very low. In this sense, the low creates my illness as it is sapping my strength.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"If I have some time in the calm area, perhaps I can see that I am going through the break-up of my marriage, that this has happened to a lot of other people, that it is incredibly painful yet ordinary. Perhaps in the calm I can draw on the deep knowledge that we had five very good years together and that in ways my wife and I were really good for each other in those five years. Perhaps I can draw on my belief that love does not always take one form. My wife and I had a love that was important and while the hurt, sadness is unbearable perhaps I can believe that that can pass. Within the calm, I do not have to create an illness out of this hurt that that I am going through.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Within the calm lies our incredible ability to recuperate, adapt, to keep going in the fact of surprising change and often unbearable pain. For me, somewhere deep in our organism we know that tragedy is mundane and we live in a world of hurt. I do not know if it is because we know this that we have so much strength to cope, or because we have so much strength to cope we can face the reality of how life hard is. I do know that people are mainly strong, healthy and capable of contributing. I know that because I have some understanding of the calm, and of the strength that we have when we are in touch with our true selves; because it is the true me that I can find when I can relate to my calm, I can be close to that point of stillness. Personally I am not very often there. To be there more than I am is a struggle that requires a lot of discipline and a lot of help from others.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"One of the ways we get hurt in the compulsive highs is that we are taken away from the true awareness that lies in the calm. The distance between the calm and the high represents a loss of awareness.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"When we have a relationship to the calm area, we can make contributions to others without defeating ourselves by the highs of grandiose plans or the lows of demeaning our abilities; and what I am talking about now is a relationship to the calm, I am not saying that we should always stay in that still area. We need the energy to flow through the highs and we need to recuperate that energy in the lows. We need the aggressiveness and the risk-taking of the swinging high and we need the evaluation self dance of our lows.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"However, our true strength and our health and our awareness lies in the calm.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"h2\",{children:\"The use of deep highs and lows\"}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[/*#__PURE__*/e(\"strong\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{})}),\"There is however, another force that can counteract our fears. Within the extreme highs and lows of the pendulum in which we experience so much of our hurt, lies the energy to shake our life at its very roots. Within that shaking we can often find really useful new directions. In the anger at our superiors in a job we do not like and where we are being treated unfairly, we can find the courage to take the risk of resigning; and that feeling of being able to feel ourselves in an environment is both very calm and very powerful. This is the calmness and the power of at times being able to feel ourselves in a beautiful physical setting. \u2013 A sea shore at moonlight, or being alone on a mountain top and at that time we can have the awareness of both the grandeur of nature and our own insignificance and our own power. True awareness is the balancing of being able to see myself as both insignificant and powerful, and to skip ahead to some material we will be dealing with later it also the ability to be able to see myself as both caring and cruel. In short, within the calm I am able to see how I relate to my world and I am able to see that on a mundane, day-2-day, moment to moment basis.\"]}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"If we are swinging to extreme highs and then falling into extreme lows, we will not have a relationship to the calm. The calm will not exist for us. We will not have a way of tapping that strength that health and that awareness. The fall from an extreme high is such that we spend no time in the calm and we do not even know its existence. It is like being on a fast train at night time; we do not know the country we are in.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[\"If you'd like to find out more, then do \",/*#__PURE__*/e(i,{href:\"https://brighton-counselling.co.uk/contact\",openInNewTab:!1,smoothScroll:!1,children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"a\",{children:\"get in touch\"})}),\" and we can have an initial chat free of charge.\"]}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"em\",{children:\"\\xa9 Peter Fleming \u2013 The Pellin Institute.\"})})]})},{index:16,id:\"EXsBQaMBe\",[o]:\"Gestalt therapy \u2013 a brief introduction\",[s]:\"gestalt-therapy-a-brief-introduction\",[l]:d({src:\"https://framerusercontent.com/images/S2zg1gAxZ9RrdYEm2Ve6JJbTIA.jpg\",srcSet:\"https://framerusercontent.com/images/S2zg1gAxZ9RrdYEm2Ve6JJbTIA.jpg?scale-down-to=512 512w, https://framerusercontent.com/images/S2zg1gAxZ9RrdYEm2Ve6JJbTIA.jpg 820w\"},\"Gestalt therapy\"),[h]:\"Through Gestalt counselling you can learn that being aware of their internal self is key to understanding why you react and behave in certain ways...\",[c]:/*#__PURE__*/t(r.Fragment,{children:[/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Gestalt therapy refers to a form of psychotherapy that derives from the gestalt school of thought. It was developed in the late 1940s by Fritz Perls and is guided by the relational theory principle that every individual is a whole (mind, body and soul), and that they are best understood in relation to their current situation as he or she experiences it.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"The approach combines this relational theory with present state \u2013 focusing strongly on self-awareness and the \u2018here and now\u2019 (what is happening from one moment to the next). In gestalt therapy, self-awareness is key to personal growth and developing full potential. The approach recognises that sometimes this self-awareness can become blocked by negative thought patterns and behaviour that can leave people feeling dissatisfied and unhappy.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"It is the aim of a gestalt therapist to promote a non-judgemental self-awareness that enables clients to develop a unique perspective on life. By helping an individual to become more aware of how they think, feel and act in the present moment, gestalt therapy provides insight into ways in which he or she can alleviate their current issues and distress in order to aspire to their maximum potential.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"h2\",{children:\"Key concepts of gestalt therapy\"}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{}),\"Gestalt therapy works through the interconnection of key concepts. These offer insight into the processes involved in therapy sessions between the therapist and client(s). Focusing on the present, imagining it separate from the future and past. This is considered essential. The process follows an individual\u2019s experience in a way that does not involve seeking out the unconscious, but staying with what is present and figural.\"]}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[/*#__PURE__*/e(\"strong\",{children:\"Respect\"}),\"\\xa0\u2013 Clients, whether an individual, group or family, are treated with profound respect by a gestalt therapist. Providing a balance of support and challenge is key to helping those taking part to feel comfortable about opening up and acknowledging areas of resistance.\"]}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[/*#__PURE__*/e(\"strong\",{children:\"Emphasis on experience\"}),\"\\xa0\u2013 The gestalt approach focuses on experience in terms of an individual\u2019s emotions, perceptions, behaviours, body sensations, ideas and memories. A therapist encourages the client to \u2018experience\u2019 in all of these ways, vividly in the here and now.\"]}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[/*#__PURE__*/e(\"strong\",{children:\"Creative experiment and discovery\"}),\"\\xa0\u2013 There is a range of experimental methodology used by therapists to test their client\u2019s experience. These involve highly creative and flexible techniques to help them open up and acknowledge hidden feelings.\"]}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[/*#__PURE__*/e(\"strong\",{children:\"Social responsibility\"}),\"\\xa0\u2013 The gestalt approach recognises that humans have a social responsibility for self and for others. It demands respect for all people and acknowledges that everyone is different. Ultimately it encourages individuals to adopt an egalitarian approach to social life.\"]}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[/*#__PURE__*/e(\"strong\",{children:\"Relationship\"}),\"\\xa0\u2013 Relating is considered central to human experience and gestalt therapy considers individuals as \u2018whole\u2019 when they have a good relationship with themselves and others around them. The interpersonal relationship between the individual and therapist that is developed and nurtured in sessions is a key guiding process in therapy.\"]}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"h2\",{children:\"How does gestalt therapy work?\"}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{}),\"Fundamentally, gestalt therapy works by teaching clients how to define what is truly being experienced rather than what is merely an interpretation of the events. Those undertaking gestalt therapy will explore all of their thoughts, feelings, behaviours, beliefs and values to develop awareness of how they present themselves and respond to events in their environment. This gives them the opportunity to identify choices, patterns of behaviour and obstacles that are impacting their health and well-being, and preventing them from reaching their full potential.\"]}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"The unfolding of this therapeutic process will typically involve a range of expressive techniques and creative experiments developed collaboratively between therapist and client. These will be appropriate for the client and their specific problems. Below are some of the most common methods used:\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"h2\",{children:\"Role-play\"}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{}),\"Role-play can help individuals to experience different feelings and emotions and better understand how they present and organise themselves.\"]}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"h2\",{children:\"The \u2018open chair\u2019 technique\"}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{}),\"The open chair technique involves two chairs and role-play, and can give rise to emotional scenes. The client sits opposite an empty chair and must imagine someone (usually himself/herself or parts of him or her) in it. They then communicate with this imaginary being \u2013 asking questions and engaging with what they represent. Next, they must switch chairs so they are physically sitting in the once empty chair. The conversation continues, but the client has reversed roles \u2013 speaking on behalf of the imagined part of his or her problem. This technique aims to enable participants to locate a specific feeling or a side of their personalities they had \u2018disowned\u2019 or tried to ignore. This helps them to accept polarities and acknowledge that conflicts exist in everyone.\"]}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"h2\",{children:\"Dialogue\"}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{}),\"A gestalt therapist will need to engage the client in meaningful and authentic dialogue in order to guide them into a particular way of behaving or thinking. This may move beyond simple discussion to more creative forms of expression such as dancing, singing or laughing.\"]}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"h2\",{children:\"Discussing dreams\"}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{}),\"Dreams play an important role in gestalt therapy, as they can help individuals to understand spontaneous aspects of themselves. Fritz Perls frequently asked clients to relive his or her dreams by playing different objects and people in the dream. During this they would be asked questions like: \u201CWhat are you aware of now?\u201D to sharpen self-awareness.\"]}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"h2\",{children:\"Attention to body language\"}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{}),\"Throughout therapy, a gestalt therapist will concentrate on body language, which is considered a subtle indicator of intense emotions. When specific body language is noticed, the therapist may ask the client to exaggerate these movements or behaviours. This is thought to intensify the emotion attached to the behaviour and highlight an inner meaning. For example, a client may be showing signs of clenched fists or frowning, to which the therapist may ask something along the lines of: \u201CWhat are you saying with this movement?\u201D\"]}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"h2\",{children:\"Who can benefit?\"}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{}),\"Ultimately, gestalt therapy is considered to help individuals gain a better understanding of how their emotional and physical needs are connected. They will learn that being aware of their internal self is key to understanding why they react and behave in certain ways. This journey of self-discovery makes the approach beneficial for individuals who can be guarded when it comes to their emotions, and find it difficult to process why they feel and act the way they do. It can also provide support and a safe space for individuals going through times of personal difficulty.\"]}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Gestalt therapy is considered particularly valuable for helping to treat a wide range of psychological issues \u2013 especially as it can be applied as a long-term therapy or as a brief and focused approach. It has been found effective for managing tension, anxiety, addiction, post-traumatic stress, depression and other psychological problems that can prevent people from living life to the full. Overall, people who participate in gestalt therapy tend to feel more self-confident, calm and at peace with themselves.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"h2\",{children:\"The theory behind the \u201Cempty chair\u201D\"}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"ul\",{children:[/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"In Gestalt therapy, counsellors challenge clients with questions so that the client increases their awareness of feelings and develops a stronger ability to face daily-living situations and problems.\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Some of the most basic interventions in Gestalt Counselling include repeating significant statements, exaggerating gestures for clarification, focusing on the relationship between the client\u2019s verbal and nonverbal behaviour, and acting out both sides of a dialogue (\u201CEmpty Chair\u201D), to help the client learn more effective means of coping and to assume more responsibility for the activities of their life.\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"The emphasis is on what is being done, thought, and felt at the moment (\u201Chere and now\u201D), rather than on what occurred in the past, or what might be, could be, or even what should be.\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"The goal of Gestalt therapy is for the client to become aware of what they are doing, how they are doing it, and how they can change themselves and, at the same time, to accept and value themselves Perls\u2019 work noted that many of us split off our experience (thoughts, sensations, emotions) that are uncomfortable. The objective of his work is to move people into owning their experiences and developing into a healthy gestalt (or whole). The Gestalt therapy emphasis on personal responsibility, interpersonal contact and increased clarity of awareness of what is, could be of great value in meeting the problems of the present. One example is application of Gestalt therapy in schools (Brown & Lederman, 1970 as cited in Yontef and Simkin, 1989).\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"The Gestalt counsellor works by engaging in dialogue rather than by manipulating the patient toward some goal.\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"The function of the Gestalt counsellor is to raise awareness, which is defined as knowing what one is sensing, feeling, and thinking. Such awareness can be achieved only in the \u201Cnow,\u201D the present moment. The counsellor assists the client to become aware of \u201Cwhat\u201D and \u201Chow\u201D he or she behaves in the moment.\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Gestalt therapy fosters change primarily by the patient\u2019s learning to understand himself or herself in the world through insight. The \u201CEmpty Chair\u201D technique is typically used with interpersonal issues (i.e. a client angry at someone else, feels too submissive, lonely, etc.) It is a kind of role playing, but in this case, the client plays both roles. Employing two chairs, the counsellor asks the client to change places as the conversation unfolds. \u201CThe actual acting and movement helps the client to get in touch with deeper sensimotor emotions\u201D (Ivey & Ivey, 300).\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Rather than passively awaiting the therapist\u2019s responses and subsequent change, the client is seen as a collaborator who is to learn how to self-heal. The client is taught the difference between talking about what happened 10 minutes ago (or last week or last year and experiencing what is happening now. Unlike most other therapies, in Gestalt therapy the process of self-discovery through experimentation is the end point rather than the feeling or idea or content. All techniques in this type of intervention are elaborations of the question, \u201CWhat are you aware of (experiencing) now?\u201D and the instruction, \u201CTry this experiment and see what you become aware of (experience) or learn.\u201D (Yontef & Simkin). Many techniques are as simple as asking what the client is aware of, or what he is feeling or thinking at the moment. A subsequent technique is to follow an awareness report with the instruction: \u201CStay with it\u201D or \u201CFeel it out.\u201D \u201CStay with it\u201D encourages the client to continue with the feeling that is being reported, which builds the client\u2019s ability to further explore a feeling through to completion.\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"li\",{\"data-preset-tag\":\"p\",children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"In one study Greenberg examined the use of the two-chair technique to resolve splits. He defined a split as \u201Ca verbal performance pattern in which a client reports a division of the self process into two partial aspects of the self or tendencies.\u201D (323, as cited in Yontef & Simkin, 1989). He concludes that the two chair technique facilitates an increase in the client\u2019s depth of experiencing and often leads to resolutions of splits among people seeking counselling.\"})})]}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[\"If you'd like to find out more, then do \",/*#__PURE__*/e(i,{href:\"https://brighton-counselling.co.uk/contact\",openInNewTab:!1,smoothScroll:!1,children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"a\",{children:\"get in touch\"})}),\" and we can have an initial chat free of charge.\"]})]})},{index:17,id:\"Ge4BhKlCd\",[o]:\"Therapeutic True Rest\",[s]:\"therapeutic-true-rest\",[l]:d({src:\"https://framerusercontent.com/images/3RooH3fkAqYdp67Mw8hBhdgI3tk.jpg\",srcSet:\"https://framerusercontent.com/images/3RooH3fkAqYdp67Mw8hBhdgI3tk.jpg?scale-down-to=512 512w, https://framerusercontent.com/images/3RooH3fkAqYdp67Mw8hBhdgI3tk.jpg 820w\"},\"Therapeutic True Rest\"),[h]:\"Come to  counselling and explore your relationship with true rest and how you can build it into your life...\",[c]:/*#__PURE__*/t(r.Fragment,{children:[/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"em\",{children:\"The following post is taken from the work of Peter Fleming, Founder of The Pellin Institute.\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"True Rest is enlightened selfishness. It is that activity which renews us and enables us to have a realistic view of where our talents lie, the energy to use them and the strength to handle disappointment.\\xa0Without true rest our perception of our self, and of others, is always wrong. True rest is any activity that gets us into the calm of the pendulum. Our strength and our awareness is to be found in the calm. We see the world as beautiful and nourishing not just grey and toxic. The Calm gives us more choices about what we want to do with our emotions it is a place of particularly powerful perspective.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"It allows us to make good decisions and choices. We need \u2018sitting time\u2019, in order to be able to check out a decision from different places of The Pendulum\u2026 when we are high, when we are low, and when we are in the middle and near the calm.\\xa0\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"It is unrealistic to imagine True Rest to be anything but fleeting but by practising the tools that bring us into balance, we are better able to take better care of ourselves throughout our careers and lives.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"em\",{children:\"\u201CWithout true rest people will exaggerate their problems, manufacture problems on which to focus and waste time and energy and certainly deny the ability or willingness of others to help\u201D\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[\"If you'd like to find out more, then do \",/*#__PURE__*/e(i,{href:\"https://brighton-counselling.co.uk/contact\",openInNewTab:!1,smoothScroll:!1,children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"a\",{children:\"get in touch\"})}),\" and we can have an initial chat free of charge.\"]}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[/*#__PURE__*/e(\"em\",{children:\"(CT Manual 17-3)\"}),\" \",/*#__PURE__*/e(\"em\",{children:\"\\xa9Peter Fleming, Pellin Institute\\xa0\"})]})]})},{index:18,id:\"Eu1r9ROwf\",[o]:\"Addiction and The Pendulum in the Counselling Process\",[s]:\"addiction-and-the-pendulum-in-the-counselling-process\",[l]:d({src:\"https://framerusercontent.com/images/TbFDCOa84j36rmshWTc8Rh0ti8Q.jpg\",srcSet:\"https://framerusercontent.com/images/TbFDCOa84j36rmshWTc8Rh0ti8Q.jpg?scale-down-to=512 512w, https://framerusercontent.com/images/TbFDCOa84j36rmshWTc8Rh0ti8Q.jpg 820w\"},\"Addiction and The Pendulum\"),[h]:\"Addiction can act as a barrier between a person and their pain. Understanding the pendulum model through counselling has the potential to be life-changing...\",[c]:/*#__PURE__*/t(r.Fragment,{children:[/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"One form of Attraction to Hurt is addiction. Rather than look at the original feelings of abandonment from childhood perhaps, it is common to fall into filling the void or the \u201Chole\u201D with alcohol food or drugs, anything rather than feel the painful feelings of abandonment and loneliness.\\xa0\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[/*#__PURE__*/e(\"strong\",{children:\"\u201CBy being in your mind and constantly thinking about eating or not eating, you can distract yourself from your feelings\u201D\"}),\" (Healing the Shame that binds you\u201Dp.133).\"]}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Thoughts and mental activity are potentially addictive. Obsessing, going over and over something, is part of the addictive cycle, ruminating in a compulsive way.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"We can become addicted to abstract thinking. It can keep us from the pain that is lurking underneath. It can be a welcome distraction to mull over and over a thought or an incident rather than looking at what is really going on. It can feel easier in the short term to keep the reality of the true pain or damage under the surface, but it will come out in the end. Unfortunately ruminating can also be rather torturous and incessant in combination with the intolerable high of the pendulum. Intrusive and unwelcome.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"We can become addicted to excitement, compelled to get the next high of the pendulum, caught in a cycle of excited misery. The thrill and the energy rush towards the high prevents us from having full awareness of where we are and what we are doing. We lose sight of the middle area of the Pendulum, the Calm.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[\"Big Pendulum Swings will invariably take us into an intolerable high which can be very difficult to come out of. It is compulsive, addictive and a form of attraction to hurt. It can be at the root of affairs, gambling, it can lead to divorce, leaving a person wondering and unsure quite how they got there. We feel as if we have 100% clarity but it is only of 10% of the picture. Pendulum swings can be brought on by referrals or memory triggers, being too emotionally engaged, emotionally reacting. We need emotional distance to get into the calm of the pendulum. \",/*#__PURE__*/e(\"em\",{children:\"\u201COur true strength, our real health, and our genuine awareness is to be found in the calm\u201D (CT Manual 13-5).\"})]}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"The Pendulum can cause the manufacture of unnecessary problems through emotional swings. When in the Low we feel negative and will look and will most certainly find evidence to prove that all is negative and bleak in our world. We sabotage help. This is a form of Attraction to Hurt. We try to pull others into our low and they can easily get pulled in if unaware of the concept of process over content. In other words the person is in the low, their process. This is a warning sign to the therapist or other person. Warning, do not get pulled into the content, the detail of what they are saying, hold an awareness of the process which is the low of the pendulum.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[\"If you'd like to find out more, then do \",/*#__PURE__*/e(i,{href:\"https://brighton-counselling.co.uk/contact\",openInNewTab:!1,smoothScroll:!1,children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"a\",{children:\"get in touch\"})}),\" and we can have an initial chat free of charge.\"]}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"em\",{children:\"\u2018The Pendulum\u2019 \\xa9 Peter Fleming, Founder of The Pellin Institute.\"})})]})},{index:19,id:\"FsKe_qEVW\",[o]:\"Boundaries and Relationships in working towards change\",[s]:\"boundaries-and-relationships-in-working-towards-change\",[l]:d({src:\"https://framerusercontent.com/images/4FGwp7aCMlnzI3ds9zWmQVaOs8Y.jpg\",srcSet:\"https://framerusercontent.com/images/4FGwp7aCMlnzI3ds9zWmQVaOs8Y.jpg?scale-down-to=512 512w, https://framerusercontent.com/images/4FGwp7aCMlnzI3ds9zWmQVaOs8Y.jpg 820w\"},\"Boundaries and Relationships\"),[h]:\"Healthy boundaries in relationships do not come naturally to some people. Through counselling it is possible to explore what reasonable boundaries look like...\",[c]:/*#__PURE__*/t(r.Fragment,{children:[/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Building boundaries as an adult can be frustrating and painful because we are learning what we should have learnt when we were children. When we start to say no I can\u2019t do that for you, I need to take care of myself, I\u2019m angry with you, I find that remark offensive, we will see how capable we really are of sticking up for and taking care of ourselves. We can stop being afraid of life.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"em\",{children:\"The following is taken from the work of Peter Fleming, Founder of The Pellin Institute.\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{}),\"Breaking patterns involves deep facing. \u201CLooking deeply and flinching at what is going on in our life, at how our actions are affecting our life and the lives of those around us\u2026facing means facing who we are, what we feel and what we are doing.\u201D (CT Manual 24-2)\"]}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Personal development comes through doing the work, through therapy. \u201CThe average person, having been raised in an atmosphere full of splits, has lost his Wholeness, his Integrity. To come together again he has to heal the dualism of his person, of his thinking, and of his language.\u201D (Gestalt Therapy- Introduction p.8)\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:\"Perls said awareness was key to everything. He would say better than trying to change something, the thing to do was simply to be aware of it \u2013 fully aware, deeply aware-and with that awareness the thing could change of itself, if that\u2019s what was needed. (A Guide to Humanistic Psychology \u2013 p.25) The first step towards change is awareness. The second step is acceptance.\"}),/*#__PURE__*/e(\"p\",{children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"br\",{className:\"trailing-break\"})}),/*#__PURE__*/t(\"p\",{children:[\"If you'd like to find out more, then do \",/*#__PURE__*/e(i,{href:\"https://brighton-counselling.co.uk/contact\",openInNewTab:!1,smoothScroll:!1,children:/*#__PURE__*/e(\"a\",{children:\"get in touch\"})}),\" and we can have an initial chat free of charge.\"]})]})}];for(let e of p)Object.freeze(e);a(p,{SpoQpzRcg:{defaultValue:\"\",title:\"Title\",type:n.String},Vu_MjvNyj:{title:\"Slug\",type:n.String},XUP79sIq3:{title:\"Image\",type:n.ResponsiveImage},EQBQjCniZ:{defaultValue:\"\",title:\"Snippet\",type:n.String},BWeBLO_ZW:{defaultValue:\"\",title:\"Content\",type:n.RichText}}),p.displayName=\"Blog\";export default p;export const enumToDisplayNameFunctions={};export const utils={async getSlugByRecordId(e,t){var a;return null===(a=p.find(t=>t.id===e))||void 0===a?void 0:a[s];},async getRecordIdBySlug(e,t){var a;return null===(a=p.find(t=>t[s]===e))||void 0===a?void 0:a.id;}};\nexport const __FramerMetadata__ = {\"exports\":{\"default\":{\"type\":\"data\",\"name\":\"data\",\"annotations\":{\"framerContractVersion\":\"1\",\"framerEnumToDisplayNameUtils\":\"2\",\"framerRecordIncludedLocalesKey\":\"includedLocales\",\"framerSlug\":\"Vu_MjvNyj\",\"framerRecordIndexKey\":\"index\",\"framerCollectionUtils\":\"1\",\"framerCollectionId\":\"Dp6iOgS4Q\",\"framerRecordIdKey\":\"id\",\"framerData\":\"\"}},\"utils\":{\"type\":\"variable\",\"annotations\":{\"framerContractVersion\":\"1\"}},\"enumToDisplayNameFunctions\":{\"type\":\"variable\",\"annotations\":{\"framerContractVersion\":\"1\"}},\"__FramerMetadata__\":{\"type\":\"variable\"}}}"],
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